𝐇𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐞 [𝐇.𝐒] vol.2

𝟐𝟎

I've got thick skin and an elastic heart
But your blade it might be too sharp

I'm like a rubber band until you pull too hard
I may snap and I move fast

But you won't see me fall apart

elastic heart- sia

A long inhale.

A smokey exhale...

I know I shouldn't be doing this while I stared at the cigarette in between my fingers. Addiction does things to someone and that need to satisfy the silent hunger for a high just fucks you're train of thought.

Or its just the force of habit.

Although I hated the taste of nicotine and the smell that it felt off, like I was a smokey cloud. But the act of smoking and having thst small habit satisfied ceased the tightness in my muscles.

"Aren't you suppose to be sober?" Natasha stared at me while I stared at the reason why I went down that hill of addiction.

Yet I couldn't blame her but myself for not finding a better outlet to deal with my pain and I cant blame the choices I made for myself because I was the only one consuming the drugs and she never told me to take them.

Or whatever Chris told me in therapy...

"Aren't you suppose to be dead?" I nearly smiled on how quick I managed to snap back at her.

Her dark eyebrows were pulled together as she look at me with a annoyed glare. I didnt care of what she was feeling towards me or why she was here.

Natasha looked like she was ready to go on a murder spree with a black baseball cap and a black jacket and leggings, her hair hidden in the hat and jacket.

"I dont want to start this all over again Charlie"I opened my mouth to interject that I had a right but she beat me to the punch "I deserve the hate, the comments and the dirty look because of what I did. But I deserve to explain myself, I'm your sister....at least treat like it"

I laughed flicking the cigarette to the floor "My sisters is dead. Buried. I dont know who you are"

She looked hurt and a tiny part of me regretted saying that she wasnt my sister although what I said was the truth...it was for me...for her it seemed like her leaving didn't change.

"I looked for you for one reason Natalie and that reason only. Not to be buddy buddy again with your or live happily ever after"

I crossed my arms looking at her with a harsh glare.

"I want the people I love not to be killed by the dead pool you put out and also so I dont get killed because I'm related to you" I touched the scar where I got stabbed because of her and this time I can blame her for something.

It didnt hurt anymore but the pain of that night didnt go away...

"I didn't put it out" I raised a brow laughing at her like she told some sort of joke.

I stopped when I realized she was being serious and I audibly groaned knowing I'm getting roped into her lies and manipulation. I was getting seriously annoyed how many twists and turns my life was doing as if I hadn't enough things going on with me, my mental health could only take so much. 

"I'm not going to lie to and say I never made the list. I did for a reason, my reasons. But I never put them out for prize money" I hated that I recognized her 'I'm not fucking around' look easily causing me to grit my teeth letting her continue to explain "Nobody was suppose to see that, it was even suppose to be used from the way its being used. Well not exactly the way whoever put it out is using it as especially adding names to it"