As soon as I got to the bathroom, I first checked to make sure that it was completely empty. It was. I rolled up my sleeve to see that the cuts had been reopened.
This has happened occasionally, so ever since the first time, I have carried a few band aids with me. After rinsing the blood from my cuts and washing it with some soap, I opened a band aid and put it on.
Now I just had to try to get the "Kool-Aid" out of my sleeve.
I double checked to make sure there was no one in the bathroom before taking this next risk. It was clear. I took off my sweatshirt, revealing all the marks from the pain that I had inflicted on myself in the past few months.
After I applied soap to the very bottom part of my sleeve, I rinsed it with hot water. Most of the blood came out. Then, I dried it with some paper towel and put the sweatshirt back on my body.
"Did you get it out?" Nick asked once I returned to the table.
"Most of it," I replied as I sat down. "I'll just use some stain remover when I put it in the wash later."
We continued studying, but occasionally I'd place my hands under the table and feel the left sleeve, checking to make sure that there was no blood soaking through.
***
When I got home, I checked my phone. I didn't want to check it when I was studying for two reasons. The first reason was that I needed to focus on studying and the second reason was that I didn't want to be rude to Nick by constantly checking my phone.
Abbie and Amiya had blown up my phone. All of the texts were about my "date" with Nick. Which, by the way, this wasn't a date. It was just two friends of the opposite sex studying together.
I laughed as I plopped onto my bed and began to reply to them. The questions were exactly what I had expected: Did he make you laugh? Did he reach for your hand? Did you blush? Did he kiss you?
All of these questions I answered no to except for the one where they asked if he made me laugh.
***
As I walked into school on Wednesday, I was met with a sight that I didn't want to see at seven in the morning. It was Josh and all his hockey friends standing around my locker.
My breathing hitched and my throat began to get dry. This couldn't be happening. Not again. Haven't they done enough already?
Considering the fact that Josh and his goons hadn't bothered me on Monday or Tuesday, I was beginning to feel like Josh had stopped his jerk ways, that maybe he had changed for the better. But, now I see that he just wanted me to have some peace of mind before he dropped a bomb that was going to cause me to explode.
I turned and walked the other way, just as I saw my best friends running towards me. "Did you see?" Abbie asked.
That was enough for me. If Abbie and Aniya had seen what had happened, then surely the whole school had. I sprinted down to my locker and pushed through the bulging group of hockey players.
When I go to my locker, I saw the same thing that Josh had given me on Friday. It was the ugliest girl competition poll. But, this time, there was a photoshopped picture of me. Josh had photoshopped my head onto a pig.
All around me I began to hear laughter from the hockey players. But then, it slowly began to fade. I was going into numb mode. Numb mode was where I went completely blank. I didn't hear anything, I didn't comprehend, I just stared into space.
I don't know how long I was like that, but when I finally snapped out of it, the boys were gone and Abbie and Amiya were at my sides.
I stared at the photo of me and tore it off my locker. The class bell must've rang because I noticed that the halls were deserted except for Amiya, Abbie, and I. I pounded my fist against my locker.
YOU ARE READING
Just Have Faith
Romance"But, I can't do this anymore," I told him. "I have demons that I can't control." "Just have faith," he told me. *** A book in which Layla, a girl with depression who is atheist, meets a boy named Nick who changes her views. One thing that's differe...