Artistic Love

Part Three-Felie: Reveal

I know you'll enjoy this chapter... -Jayo_3

My thoughts wouldn't release off the idea of kissing Jezelle. Loving Jezelle. Caring for Jezelle. All I wanted to do was to hold her with my entire heart. I wanted to be there for her, but I still wasn't sure about it at all. I wasn't ready for all of it.

I was sketching on her bed as she watered her plants on the balcony. My mind kept going back to the balcony image as the sun was going down. She continued to water her plants, her shoulders slouched over the plants. The sun started to go down, the colors filling the sky once more. I watched as my fingers moved without my consent, scribbling some sort of variation of the past sunset drawings I had made.

Jezelle walked back inside her room and let out a deep breath, "That watering can is so heavy at first. Feels like a pound taken off my back as the water gets poured in." She noticed my hands were drawing something, so she came and sat next to me. "What're you drawing?"

I quickly ripped the drawing out of my notebook and put it inside the many drawings I had previously made. "Just another sketch."

We sat next to each other for a few seconds, making some eye contact but not enough for me to engage in any conversation with her.

"I was thinking that we could maybe talk about what exactly happened with you and Trevor," she finally let out, "It might make you feel better about what happened if you talk about it." Jezelle grabbed my hands and practically dragged me towards the balcony. We sat down next to each other on the floor and kept our eyes on the sun going down. "What happened?" Jezelle asked through the sounds of cars driving by the house.

I pulled my stack of drawings closer to my chest and took one deep breath, "I knew what was going to happen, so why was I so nervous? I could hear the words practically on repeat in my head. 'I like you, do you like me?' Every time it was replayed within my head, the more it made me think that I might not like him in that way. He kissed me on the lips, y'know. All I could hear was that one thing you said at the pool. What's the worst that could happen? When we kissed, the magic died. My feelings died."

"Oh," Jezelle sighed out, "I guess you must not have a crush anymore. You're a free bird, Felie. Enjoy it while it lasts."

I looked at her, her eyes shimmering with the sunlight on her face. "I never said that I didn't like anyone, Jezelle."

Jezelle looked at me, clearly having a bit of confusion about what I was saying. "You like someone else? Man, you moved on from Trevor quick! He better not be another stupid guy in eleventh grade. They clearly aren't good enough for you. But please don't let it be a senior either. Disappointment of them leaving for college is something I don't want you to have to deal with-"

"Jezelle," I looked at her with a smile, "It isn't a senior or junior boy."

She looked even more confused when I said that, "All the boys in our grade are ugly. Well, I think all men are ugly but that's just a perk of not being attracted to them. Men are nasty little butts if you ask me, but this is about you. If you have to like one of them, make it an athletic kid. It'll give you some sporting events to go to and you can kidnap me for them!"

"It's not a sophomore boy either."

Jezelle looked at me with the most intrigued face ever. "You would never go a grade younger. Is it a guy in college? Is he at a different school-"

"Jezelle! It's not a boy!" I burst out.

Jezelle's eyes immediately sparked with joy. She squealed a little bit and stood up from pure bliss she was getting from this little reveal. "Oh my goodness, you are in like with someone that's not a guy! You might be bi, judging how you did like Trevor for a few weeks. But you could also be pan if you're open to dating more than just boys and girls. Is it a girl? Do I know the girl? I need details!" Jezelle walked into her room, practically bouncing across the room.

I stood up and followed her pathway into the bedroom, "I'm still not sure about my crush, it is very rushed. You're right about it being really quickly after Trevor, so my feelings just barely appeared. It is a girl, though."

"Yes!" Jezelle buzzed. She jumped onto her bed and turned to look at me with a crazy woman's eyes. "I need more details about this girl!"

I looked at my stack of papers in my hands, knowing the drawing I had previously drawn. I handed the stack to Jezelle, who looked a bit confused. "My crush has always been there for me since I met her. She is so kind, she's funny, she listens to me...I know I could get through thick and thin with her by my side." Jezelle scanned through the drawings of me, still searching for answers to why I handed them to her. "She has the most shimmering blue eyes I have ever seen on a human body. She has the most gorgeous hair that doesn't even need any tempering, it's just natural curl and shows how lucky she is to know how beautiful she is without anything extra. She's...amazing in every way possible. She made me fall for a girl for the first time, and she doesn't even know it."

Jezelle stopped in her tracks when she caught sight of my most recent drawing. Her eyes widened, her face frozen. She picked it up in both her hands, scanning over it with all of her attention. She left the stack of papers on my bed and walked to the balcony, still holding the drawn picture. "I don't understand, you don't..." she turned towards me and I was already grabbing my papers that she left on the bed. I searched for the first one that Jezelle had drawn over a month ago. I lifted it up for her to see. "Felie..."

I pointed at her drawing with full confidence, "My crush is the most talented dork I have ever met. She loves plants, every shade and gradient of black, smiles even through all of her pain that she pretends to not show but we know that she feels. She is the most precious woman in my life, and I'm still not sure if I am really in love with her."

My arms were shaking, so I put them down so she couldn't see them, "I have seen every side to her feelings. I have scrolled through her social media for hours, looking at every single picture we have together, cherishing those memories that we were so fortunate enough to make together."

Jezelle was backed up on the balcony, staring at me with tears brimming her eyes. I continued, "I have seen how she's felt about liking me. Only a few hours ago did I see her on a call with her friend complaining how she saw me kiss a guy. But that kiss was crucial, teaching me a valuable lesson about how I have been feeling."

"Ever since I kissed Trevor, I knew it wasn't right. But I know something that this special girl told me almost a month ago. What's the worst that can happen from two people's lips making contact?" Jezelle was starting to cry.

"Jezelle, would you...kiss me?"

She stood still on the balcony, clearly making some decision in her brain. "I would."

I threw my papers ahead of me and ran up to Jezelle. She grabbed behind my head and I went straight for the jaw again. I put her lips on mine, and the papers falling down beside us gave it some sort of whimsical effect. Her lips felt softer than Trevor's had been, cracked more from constant touching at her dry lips. Her movements on my lips were perfect. I closed my eyes, trying to decide if this kiss felt right. If this kiss would be the one that would decide it all for me. When we released contact and stared at each other, she was wiping her tears away so she could see me more clearly. My brain made it's mind up. I went in for another kiss, taking a breath away from Jezelle once more. She wrapped her arms around me, embracing this new touch that we were sharing. I released her once again and looked into her eyes, "I was right."

Jezelle laughed and just pulled me into a hug. I put my head into her shoulder and closed my eyes. What's the worst that can happen?