Fake Vows (KaiStal f.f)

Ch. 13

As my eyes started to expose itself to light once more, I felt a wet towel being wiped on my forehead.

"Oh, you're awake." A voice realized and set the towel down on the table next to the bed.

Ironically, it was Jongin's voice.

"What... happened?" I asked, still a bit tired and unaware of what happened.

It's not like I don't know, but it's not like I know. I'm just unsure of what happened.

"Let me help you sit up first." He put his right arm under my shoulders and froze.

I looked up into his eyes and our eyes locked on each other's.

Nothing else could explain how warm it felt to look into his eyes. It was like he was trying to brainwash me into thinking he was God or something. However, I snapped out of the daydream within seconds.

"W- what are y-you doing?" I stuttered, my hands grabbed the bed sheets out of embarrassment.

He realized what he had just done and quickly pulled my body up into a sitting position.

"Explain to me what happened." I literally ordered him like a slave.

I could tell something was making him hesitate to tell me. The look in his eyes seemed restless and unexplained, while his hands started playing with each other.

"Your blood pressure dropped..." He whispered in the quietest voice you could imagine.

"And?"

He hesitated once more.

"I carried you back up here, to your room... in my arms..."

He's making seem like he touched the Queen of Great Britain or something. It's literally nothing bad. He didn't rape me or anything of that such.

"I might've done something else..." He confessed, continuing to fidget with his watch.

I take that back.

"...What?"

"...I kissed you." He confessed so fast that I almost didn't even make out what he said.

I shut my mouth and didn't say nor do anything.

I mean, a kiss isn't that much, right? Plus, he's my fiancée. It's literally nothing.

But when it's from your ex and he's in love with someone else... it seems dirty. I don't even know how to explain what dirty in this sentence means. No, I don't mean 'sexually' dirty, I mean dirty.

But the more I think about it, the more I liked it. Kim Jong In, someone who was down-to-earth kind, the shyest boy on earth, the guy who made fans swoon over him... The boy who once told me I was his everything and only one, the boy who once made me feel like I was in heaven, the boy who once broke my heart...

Kim Jong In.

I will never forget what horrible things he's done to me, nor will I remember all the incredible things he's given to me.

But, right now, all I want is to truly love him once again. I want to, but I can't.

I just can't.

"Please kiss me." I suddenly blurted out.

He stared at me with a blank expression.

"...Soojung..."

"Please." I was literally begging him. Tears were already making their way down my face, and I was a hot mess.

I'm sick, emotional, and so heartbroken that I asked my ex, whom I want to love one again, to kiss me.

And he did.

He slowly took his hands and placed them on my cheek. He slowly craned his face down to where my lips were and connected out lips.

I closed my eyes and just forgot everything that had happened in the past. What matters is what's happening right this instant. It's what I truly want, but I cannot have it.

And as our lips slowly embraced, I took the chance and slid my hand behind

I could tell that that move was too much for him. No way on earth would that be acceptable this second, but I still took the chance and did it.

"I'm sorry." He whispered as he slowly backed away from me, taking my hand off his neck.

"No, I truly loved it. Thank you."