𝐖𝐖𝐖.𝐍𝐄𝐎𝐂𝐔𝐋𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄.𝐀𝐈 𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐄𝐖 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐏

𝟎.𝟓

book- cassandra: the african girl
author- Joker_butterfly
bot- mcflurry-x

title- (9/10)

i won't say the title is unique but it's very relevant to the story which revolves around this sweet african girl, cassandra. i liked the title, it kinda sounds like a real novel title.

cover- 10/10

i love the cover! it's so simple yet hints you about the story. i love how the cover doesn't display any characters and better yet shows the moving from africa to america. the colors are pretty and i find this very cute!

blurb- 9/10

the blurb has a good balance with its length and it is great how it doesn't reveal too much about the plot but i cut off one mark for the grammatical error, it's supposed to be – but life is changing for her in more than* one way.

1st impression - 3/5

it was good, honestly, i don't read teen fiction stories but this was nice! i loved cassie's characters, however, it all seemed a bit rushed to me. the change of scenes weren't evident, you could have added a divider or just a symbol after a scene ended, that would help a lot. abruptly changing scenes reduces the interest.

writing style & grammar- 20/30

alright, here i feel sorry for deducting a lot of marks but it's all because of the grammatical errors, there were too many. i will point out some:

“ would you like some pancakes, honey? ”

“would you like some pancakes, honey?” 

there's no space after and before quotation marks.

his “top secret job”

his ‘top secret job’

here, (regarding the stories) the single quotation marks can be used to highlight some words because we already use double quotation marks for dialogues so to avoid any confusion, it's better to use single marks however, the usage depends. 

i was not gonna eat those. how could i i mean some were on the floor, ….

i was not gonna eat those. how could i? i mean, some were on the floor, …

don't miss the punctuation marks! use them wherever it's necessary!

these weren't all, there were more. i suggest you read more books, reading helps! you can also research more about grammars, this will not only help you in writing stories but also everywhere else. other than the grammar, vocabulary was simple and good, no extraordinary words which is good as running to google each and every new word found to understand the scenes is annoying. as for your writing style, it's simple and understandable. but i think you gotta improve here, try to be more detailed about the settings, characters and the senses. it makes the story more interesting!

povs/narrator- 4/5

the book was in cassie's point of view, it was constant and there were no changes at all. but like i said, try to be more detailed and interesting so that we can paint a better image of the scenes. 

plot- 14/20

the plot was cute. it actually reminded me of mean girls where the protagonist cady was also living in africa and then moved to the u.s. anyways, back to the story. i really liked cassie's character, she is sweet and shy! but also very courageous. there were many character developments in the story which were positive, especially of lin. the characters were all perfectly aligned with the main characters however, with conrad and will, character arc was missing. it would have been actually better, if you had penned down their inner thoughts and feelings they went through in a third person point of view or the respective character's pov. because we don't know what changed conrad at the end of the story or how will started liking cassie. also with lin, who used to not like cassie. and there's a plot hole! what about cassie's father's secret job that she eventually found out? wasn't she going to confront him about it? the abrupt ending of the story was not good, it feels very incomplete. the last chapter actually feels like a cliffhanger rather than an ending of the book. i expected a better ending, maybe how cassie has a personality growth. how she starts prioritizing herself, ignoring the two boys, her friendship deepening with lin and chloe and maybe visiting rose. even when cassie proudly expressed her feelings about how the guys were using her, i didn't get to imagine how will and conrad looked, their expressions and such. so, there's a lot missing. even though it's cassie's pov, you can mention how they look in her eyes, she might guess how they might be feeling and all.

overall impression- 7/10

the beginning was all good even though some chapters felt rushed and despite all the grammatical errors, it was really interesting! you really have a potential in this, if you improve and cover up everything mentioned, this book would be lit! i enjoyed reading, anyway. just keep reading others books, you can see how they describe scenes or the actions and you can add it in your own way! 

total- 76/100

scope of improvement?

everything is pointed out above! hope i was able to help! keep up with the good work!