the 100, NIGHTBLOOD

15 - If I Die Young + finn

AU SEASON 2, NO FLARKE, FINN KILLED GROUNDERS IN SEARCH OF YOU

The Dropship reminds you of so many bad memories. As well as some good ones, like meeting Finn when you operated on Jasper. The way he looked at you from the beginning as if there was no where else he could look. But now Finn is going to die. You just need to talk to him alone. No Bellamy or Clarke, just you two.

"Everybody else thinks we can save you. Finn we can't." You look at him, really look and you can see the dark circles around his eyes, the scars everywhere and the slightly crooked nose from battles he probably never won. You see your Finn, for one of the last times.

He nods, looking down at the scuffed metal floor, "I know."

"Hey, instead of talking about the bad things, let's talk about the good things." You say forcing a smile onto your lips, you pull him down to the floor, sitting cross legged across from the love of your life.

"Y/N, I love the way you laugh at your own jokes," He tells you, "Even if to the rest of us, they aren't that funny. So I just laugh so I can hear yours for a little longer." He smirks.

"What? My whole life is a lie Finn. But one of the many things I love about you is how you always try to be the hero. But you're not doing it  for attention, you just want to save people. Half the time you're running around, risking your life for us. Thank you." He takes your hands and gently caresses them, making you feel more emotional, you hold it back and move your body's closer together.

"I love your smile. Whenever you do smile, I feel happier. Knowing your safe." He gives a weak smile.

"I love your voice. It makes me feel safe down here," You stare at him and then it all gets to you, and you put your arms around him and never want to let go, because you've never felt more at home, "I just love you Finn."

"I love you too Y/N. So much and I just want you to be happy, take care of the others for me. Alright?" He pulls you back to look at you.

"Of course."

"And when you..." He is forcing back tears, "When you get my body, I- I want to go on the river, it's long and will float me to the sea. I don't want you knowing you're constantly next to my body."

"Finn please." You muffle a sob.

"No, just promise me you will do it." He looks at you like the fate of the world is in your hands.

"I promise." You wipe away at your slightly moist eyes.

"Do you remember the butterflies?"

"Of course, one landed on your finger and it was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen until of course it started to bite you." You let out a small laugh at the panic attack you had then, thinking Finn was going to lose a finger to a monstrous butterfly.

"I want those there as well, in memoriam of my finger, it will never be the same," He chuckles as he brings his hand in front of you both, he unclasps it and inside is a beautiful silver coloured ring, a simple band, "For you. It's a promise ring, just to remind you of the time we had together."

"It's beautiful," He takes your right hand and puts it on your ring finger, it's not a wedding ring, but it means so much more. He was your first love, he promises he will love you forever, you promise to never forget, to live on as he would, to fight for peace, to never take no for an answer, "I would never forget you Finn, never."

"It's just to make sure, Y/N."

You think for a second, before bringing your hands over your neck and unclasping your necklace. The one he made you after the night at the bunker, you let it hang in the air for a second before turning to him and placing it around his head.

"I'm returning this. So you can have a piece of me by your heart."

"Wasn't good enough for ya?" He smirks as he runs her fingers across the smooth metal edge until he got to a corner and he presses his thumb down, a small spot of blood forms and he pushes a bit harder, a few more drops are present now, he has zoned out completely his eyes glazed over and focusing on the pain in his ring finger.

"Finn..." You say, your voice shaky, "Finn... stop. Stop," You raise your voice and put your hands over his to physically make him stop. He has finally cracked. He snaps out of it and looks at you, a face of utter shock and pain. This is too much for him, "I just wanted you to have it when you, you know...leave me,"

He doesn't reply, as if words can't come out of his mouth.

"I think we've had enough time, you're only going to get worse. I hate seeing you like this and I do not want you cutting yourself on a metal bird to be my last memory of you, alright?" You say firmly and stand up, knowing this is it. You bring him up and gaze into his eyes for the last real time.

He opens his arms and you fall into them, "I love you." He whispers in your ear. He kisses you on the mouth, a sweet parting of ways. A taste that lingers on your lips as he untangles himself from you and walks out the dropship door.

You follow him out, a couple paces back, he doesn't look back. Clarke and Bellamy barely register what is happening but when they do, all you can hear is muffled shouting in the background, your cloudy vision focused on the boy you love. He turns to face you all, and raises his hands above his head, Grounders immediately coming out and surrounding him.

Before you lost eye contact with him, you exchanged your last words, "If you love somebody let them go. So Finn Collins, I am letting you go."

Only when you could not see him did you collapse on the floor and cry your heart out.

This song in an Glee literally made me bawl my eyes out.