How would God respond to making a mistake? Would planets collide or mountains slide into the sea? Or would the ledger of all life simply remain out kilter until a series of small events forced that ledger back into balance again? It's probably the l...
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today, September 1st
Baltimore, MD
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I will start by saying that a long time ago (way way back), I used to wish I was a cat. All those extra lives sounded so appealing to me when I was younger. But now instead of wishing I had what cats have had all along, I wonder about the millions of cats who lost count of their lives. I wonder if they worried every day about running out of time or whether they were just happy to be stuck somewhere between life #1 and life #9 chasing mice every hour of every day.
If cats were people, the people version of a cat would probably line up all nine lives side by side and ask which one of them was the best. Which one made them the happiest or the saddest and which one gave them the greatest feeling of endless invulnerability. They'd cherish the life that included their first love and weep when they recalled the life where Santa forgot to bring them the gift they wanted most that year.
But it's foolish to compare all those lives. It's like grains of sand arguing about which one of them sparkles most in the sun. They should know that (at any moment) a light breeze might flip over the sparkliest grain and turn it dull side up. Then some other grain of sand on some other beach will smile and sparkle as if its moment in the sun will never end. But a cat never bothers to smile at moments like that. In fact, they have almost no facial expressions at all. They just are. They have all the muscles they need to laugh or cry or express a flood of grief that we humans can't ever imagine, but they don't bother. When the end of cat's ninth life is approaching, they walk away and hide in their final moments. I wonder whether they ever truly loved any of their lives.
So, maybe instead of being a cat, I should wish to be a mouse even though mice are never able to relax. They dart here and there and rarely slow down. Just to keep up, their hearts beat 500 times a minute. Every moment of every day, they know that they are about to die. And with every beat of their nervous (nervous) hearts, they love life and hate the thought of leaving it behind.
As I sit beside you, my dear, I wonder if you'd rather be a cat or a mouse? Would you rather see every shadow as the final shadow (the one creeping up to kill you) or feel that life is somehow infinite. 7. 8. 9. Infinity.
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Your guide to happy endings, Edward Starling Prindle.
P.S. After all my coffee stories over all these months, you probably wouldn't believe me if I said that I have always loved life. I'm absolutely certain of that whenever I hear the sound of scraping sand beneath my feet or imagine two molecules bumping into each another in deep space. With so many things all around that make me smile, I guess it's finally time to tell you a story where everyone has a happy ending. These things happen, you know. Just not often enough. Anyway, I have to do this now, before I lose my nerve or lose my opportunity. If you could answer me, I'm sure you'd agree.
