Heartless

{13}

When they get back to the Kang Residence, much to his dismay, she asks him to wait outside of her room. Even though the door was now fixed and her room cleaned up due to the help of housekeeping, it was deemed safe in her terms but he still didn't like the idea of her being alone.

Though he understood that she needed her privacy to watch whatever was on that hard drive. Instead of arguing like he usually would, he obeyed her command and waited outside, making it known that he wasn't going anywhere. Her sweet smile upon hearing that made him feel better knowing that unlike himself, she didn't blame him for what happened the other night.

It truly wasn't his fault but he still felt a tinge of guilt, like all of his years being an assassin meant nothing compared to being her bodyguard and he failed at that. He was a perfectionist on an unhealthy level most of the time. He never accepted failure and felt the need to go beyond what others would view as limitations. He put in the work and time and became the best at everything.

Not for others, but because it gave him a sense of security and confidence knowing that he was capable of doing things that would ultimately ensure his survival. That's all he's ever done. Whenever something wasn't how he wanted it to be, he'd be disappointed and take it especially hard.

Even though he was older, it didn't mean that he thought he was above anyone else. That never meant anything to him. Unlike many others, he held a humble confidence that came off as intimidating because of how sure he was of himself and his beliefs.

He's killed countless people, and still, to this day, he doesn't regret it. Every night he sleeps like a baby, the things he's seen and done having no effect whatsoever on his conscience. Why? Because it led him to this. He wasn't one to believe in fate, but being around a woman such as Runa who did, her influence was starting to reach him just as it did many others.

She has that way about her. Jungkook saw her as a special person. She could be caring and empathetic, and within a second, she could be the coldest and cruelest person you've ever met in your life. Her duality was insane, and he felt privileged and even lucky that she liked him so much considering the trouble he's given her.

He knew well enough she secretly enjoyed their bickering, probably because she didn't have many people to talk to and liked the tension, even if her face would get all red and her eyes would narrow into intimidating slits. She would threaten him but she'd never hurt him.

She was too careful and smart to do such a thing. Not just that but her crush on him was obvious. In truth, he didn't mind it at all. If anything, he admired it. It was weird to think about, considering their age gap that made the situation feel even more forbidden than it already was, and the fact that maybe he felt some attraction to her. Keyword some, he wasn't sure how to feel about this so he was taking things extra slow.

Jungkook knew it was wrong to feel any sort of emotion towards her. He's supposed to be her bodyguard, someone who protects her and that's as far as his duties should go. But she had such an enticing energy that sucked him right in. Her sweet smile, gleaming doe eyes, and her spine-chilling gaze. Everything about her was perfect, from the tip of her head to her toes.

She was everything, a dream, and he often wondered why. Why did she have to be so much like him in so many ways? Why did her presence calm his mind and make his heart beat a little faster? Maybe this was true friendship, maybe this is what caring for somebody felt like.

He knows better. He's seen the movies, he's read the books and learned about these things. The thought of falling for her was ridiculous and so out of character for him. It wasn't necessarily denial, but he wasn't going to jump to conclusions when he'd never felt any sort of emotion related to love.