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A/n: CW of violence and gore for this chapter (though with the nature of this book, that should be expected for most chapters here on out).

..........

Xiao walked as slowly as he possibly could towards the lab. Even though he knew he couldn't avoid it, he didn't want to have to see her there. Hu Tao was his lab partner in physics; an unfortunate coincidence he'd cursed since the very first day of the semester. Even now, he wasn't sure whether professor Beidou knew about their history as ex-friends or was just oblivious to how poorly they got along.

Either way, he wished he could have switched partners. He'd checked already and knew it wasn't a possibility though, so he'd resigned himself to a whole semester of dealing with the brunette.

Finally, he reached the door to the laboratory and took in a breath as he grabbed the handle. There was no going back now; after all, he sure as hell wasn't willing to make this lab up over winter break.

You and him were supposed to be going to Mondstat then to visit your family and spend the holidays with them. You'd been looking forward to it since the year before, when he'd first met your family, and he couldn't mees that up for you. No matter how awkward he felt around your kind family members.

The second he opened the door though, the thought crossed his mind that he could turn back if he wanted to. Hu Tao was sitting at her seat with a smile on her face as she looked over at him and a chill ran down his spine at this sight. Maybe it was just because he knew about her fascination with working with dead bodies and hosting funerals, but it always made her smile look so creepy to him. Still, he made his way over to his own seat and set his back down as he took out his items for class.

For a few seconds neither of them said anything. He knew she was looking at him thought; sizing up his mood to determine whether or not she should say anything to him before the professor came in and she would lose her chance. His answer was no, she should keep her mouth shut, but it seemed she had come to a different conclusion.

"You seem tense." She observed calmly and he immediately felt his blood begin to boil just because of the fact that she was mentioning it.

"Who wouldn't be?" He replied sharply, and yet she still didn't seem to take the hint that he didn't want to talk to her. This was another reason they weren't friends anymore; she had always been too pushy.

"I'm just concerned for you," She replied, "No need to get mad at me. Did something happen earlier to stress you out?"

"Yeah, talking to you." he replied with a glare, "Just leave me alone." And with that, he let his body bend over so he could rest his head against their shared table in front of him.

"You're meaner than usual," she commented, leaning back in her seat in an effort to mask her hurt expression. She knew she deserved it; she was being pushy, after all. But since nothing else seemed to have worked on Xiao so far, this was her last attempt at trying to get him to understand where she was coming from. Having her feelings hurt was just going to have to be a side effect of that.

"Look, Xiao; you know you don't have to bear it alone," her voice softened as she glanced at his hunched over body again, "When I lost my mom as a kid I felt the same way. It was like everyone was out to get me and everything made me upset; and I didn't even know why." He said nothing as she continued with her story quietly, "It took me years to fully process the grief and until I did, every other death around me felt even worse. I didn't know how to deal with any of it so I just didn't."

She glanced at him wearily before continuing with her next sentence. "I'm sure you can relate to losing people; even before Verr Goldet-"

"Just give it up, Hu Tao!" Xiao finally snapped as he raised his head from the desk now, tears brimming in his eyes that he quickly wiped away. "My situation is nothing like yours so don't act like you understand." She froze, his words seeming to cut through her skin like knives.

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