Monarch 2: Connections

Chapter 7 - Kazuyuki and Rekka

"Why are you letting this happen? Why are you hesitating again? Are you content with letting her go? Content with losing her... Like you lost me?"

Kazuyuki woke up with a gasp, bolting upright. He was caked in a cold sweat, his breathing uncontrollable.

There was a knock at his door followed by a quiet "Kazu?" causing him to jump violently. When he looked, the door was already starting to open. Light bathed his room and from behind the door Rekka peeked inside, as soon as she laid eyes on him though, they widened in shock.

"Hey!" She said quickly as she opened the door fully and carefully walked inside before kneeling down in front of his bed, her hands resting on her knees, "Talk to me."

Kazuyuki started shivering... Something he never does. "Nigh-," his shaky voice gave out almost as soon as he tried to talk. He couldn't steady his breathing. His arms felt too tense, and he crossed them in front of him to try to keep them from trembling.

"What's going on?" Their attention was drawn to the door, where Jace was standing while rubbing sleep out of his eyes.

"I think he's having a panic attack!" Rekka said, quickly.

As soon as she said that, Jace seemed wide awake. In an instant, he analyzed his son, and was right there in front of him. Kazuyuki locked eyes with him, a practice that was now an unconscious habit when this happened.

"Kazuyuki..." One of the few times Jace addressed him by his full name. His voice was soft and quiet. "Come on, now. We've talked about this... In deeply..." Kazuyuki shuddered... But Jace's calm words were reaching him. After taking a few short breaths, he took one big deep breath. He held it for five seconds exactly, then let it out. "Slower..." Jace said. Kazuyuki obliged and slowed his exhalation immediately.

He repeated this three times... And after the third time, he was in control of his breathing and his body stopped shaking. After a moment longer, he spoke again in the same calm and neutral voice (even though he was clearly still panicking, even if slightly).

"I'm alright..."

"You wanna tell me what happened?" Jace asked, sitting next to Kazuyuki on his bed. Kazuyuki looked up to see Rekka on her knees in front of him, her eyes glassy as if she were fighting back tears.

Kazuyuki shook his head to clear his thoughts. "It was a nightmare..."

Jace's face twisted slightly in discomfort. "What can I do for you?"

The group sat in silence while Kazuyuki collected his thoughts. "I..." He honestly didn't know what he needed or wanted. He didn't know how he should be feeling right now. And the voice in his dreams. It was one he didn't recognize... Yet somehow it felt so familiar. But he was able to compose himself. "I'm sorry. There's just a lot going on. Trying to comprehend what these feelings are... It must be causing me more stress than I realized." He looked up at Rekka and attempted to put confidence in his toneless voice. "I'll be alright. I'm sorry for making you worry."

The three both sat for a moment. Kazuyuki looked at his clock to see it was early morning. Sunlight was starting to shine through his drawn curtains. School was out for the day, so the students could prepare for the ski trip tomorrow.

Kazuyuki reached for his phone and woke it up. It's been a custom for months now that he'd either wake up to a "good morning" text from Katsuki around this time (she's an early riser, even unwillingly). And if she hasn't sent one yet, he's taken the initiative to send one to her.

But for the last few weeks, since Katsuki started to hang out alone with Takashi, Katsuki's messages have been less and less. And in the last few days... Kazuyuki has been the only one sending a single "Good morning."