Chapter 15

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In the days following Dawn seeing her father and brother, she didn't speak much. She kept quiet, made her tea, sat on the deck, went for runs, read her book, trained in the home gym, trained against Max, not really putting her all into it. She wasn't herself, and both Calypso and Max could tell. They did their best to cheer her up, they made her favourite foods, bought more tequila when they ran out, blasted her favourite music on the rooftop patio. But nothing seemed to work.

It had been a year and a half since the mission in Ecuador. A year and four months since shield fell, a year since she talked to her mother, brother and Bobbi. Six months since seeing her father and eldest brother. She was still quiet, except at night when she snuck out of bed and to the ocean shore at the very edge of her property. It was quite the walk, she had to walk through the trails, and then the orchard. And then down the hill, over the rock quarry. And finally, Dawns sanctuary. She didn't tell anyone about this corner of her property. She'd never taken Max or Calypso to it. And she didn't plan on ever bringing them there. It was where she sobbed, where she screamed, where she let het thoughts take over, where she contemplated calling her brother, where she contemplated joining the mermaids she used to read so much about.

She called it 'Dusk beach'. It was where she felt her safest. It was where she could be her most vulnerable. It was her safest place. The large boulders and distance from her home muffled any noises she made. Any heart shattering sobs, any blood curdling screams, any powerful sonic yells. It's very difficult to be yourself when you've never known who that was. When at 12 years old she was enrolled in a prestigious university and had to be 'mature'. When at 16 she graduated that university with top mark and was the face of her graduating year, being up to a decade younger than her classmates. When at 18, she was fully trained to pretend to be anyone but yourself. People often say to 'just be yourself, it'll pay off in the end!' Or 'if they don't like you for who you are, they're not worth it'. But Dawn didn't know who she was. Anytime someone didn't like her, it was a mask she had carefully curated just for them. And at Dusk beach, she could figure out who herself was better than anywhere else.

Dawn was biding her time, waiting until after dinner, waiting until Calypso would kiss her cheek, and then her collarbone before sighing longingly and hugging Dawn tightly, waiting until after the bath theyd take together, sipping tequila and smiling softly at the other, waiting until after Max and Calypso drank tea with her, waiting until Max went to her own room to talk to whoever she'd been giggling to on her phone, waiting until Calypso fell asleep, waiting until she could sneak away again.

Of course, life was never quite that simple for Dawn. Because instead of Calypso and Max bringing the food out to the pool side furniture to eat, they set the dining room table. They sat across from Dawn, they spread concerned smiles across their faces. They each took one of her hands. Dawn was in no way using her brain the way she used to, she wasn't processing the way she used to, before she was filled with lies and secrets, before she had no one. Before she started pushing away the only two people she did have. Before she started drowning in a hurricane of emotions. Whipped this way and that, held under the thrashing surface by things too heavy for anyone to lift. "Are you trying to tell me you two are together now?" She blurted out with a slow blink, looking from their hands on hers, to their now very shocked faces. The pair looked at each other, and for a brief moment of insanity Dawn thought they might kiss, and then they started laughing. Well that just felt great.

"Dieux non! Ma chérie, we are worried about you" Cal said, eyebrows furrowing as she squeezed Dawns hand tightly. She did truly look worried, but Dawn couldn't help pushing them both away. Sure, they knew her biggest secrets, hell they were her secrets. But they didn't know her deepest worries and her deepest scars. The ones that no makeup or skin glue could hide. These scars were already hidden from the world, except to Dawn- they seemed so painfully obvious.

"Right well.. no need to be. I'm fine" Dawn said. She was a fabulous liar, to everyone except Bobbi, Lance, Max and her mom. Calypso was learning her tells, Calypso was becoming someone she couldn't lie to. But what was another crack in the dam? Another lie to someone she loved. Another truth that wouldn't ever be spoken.

"Dawn, come on. You've been struggling ever since you got your powers and didn't tell your family. And then with Calypso, I know it's been hard not talking to your family. And then you decided to talk to your dad, which was-" Max shook her head, undoubtedly thinking about her own horrible family. Dawn watched as the blonde absentmindedly traced the large burn scar that ran across her arm. Dawn knew it dipped under her shirt and waist line, but they never spoke of it. They didn't have to. "Talk to us"

Dawn looked between the two. She couldn't say anything, she had brought this on herself, and she couldn't turn it around. She'd stopped listening to the voicemails from her brother and mum. Benny had stopped trying, her dad had left one voicemail that she had yet to listen to, and Sara was most likely talking shit about her to her mom friends. Lance left a new voicemail almost every day, Bobbi was every week or so, Mum was a text message a day, and a call once a week. None of them got an answer, she had even shut off read receipts for her mum. "No" she said, got up, grabbed her phone and went outside.

Calypso stood to follow, Max grabbed her arm and shook her head. "Let her be for now, I'll talk to her later tonight, go for a swim or get a drink in town. Trust me" She said with a soft smile;. Max knew Dawn better than almost anyone, she may have only known her for a year or so, but they were sisters and she wouldn't let anything break that. Max grabbed a bottle of tequila, dawn's favourite, and followed her friends footsteps in the sand, out to the orchard and then through trails she's never thought to explore. She emerged from the trees to see Dawn's small frame sitting on a breathtaking beach- which was a small hike over large boulders away. She climbed closer quietly, holding the bottle high so she wouldn't accidentally smash it against the rocks.  When she got closer, she could hear Dawn crying, and her brothers voice playing from her friends phone.

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