GoodBoy [ BANGCHAN X READER ]

16: Picture

Y/N POV

BANG

I immediately sit up and look around, finding myself in my bedroom on the floor. I throw my head back in frustration, as I am getting tired of these dreams with Chan. Right on cue, I throw my head back into the wall on accident.

I let out a loud huff. I don't know if it's the sexual frustration, frustration that it's Chan or frustration that it's just a dream. Either way, I'm frustrated.

I hear footsteps hurry towards the room, and not long after the door swung open, revealing a worried Chan.

"Y/n are you okay? What happened?" Chan asked rushing over to me.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the sight of him. The reason for my frustration. The root of all my problems lately. I pushed him off of me annoyed.

"I'm fine, I was asleep and rolled off the bed," I said brushing myself off, trying to lift myself up.

"Here let me help you,"

"I got it,"

"You're hurt, let me help you,"

"I said I got it," I yelled.

I saw him flinch back from my voice. I looked up at his shocked face as his eyes looked like they would rain tears any minute.

"I'm sor-"

"I have to go to the bathroom," he interrupted, leaving the room in a hurry.

I sunk back into the floor as guilt washed over me.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," I said hitting my head on the floor.

I decided to pull myself together and apologize, but first I needed to get off this floor. I should ask Lee Know how to apologize, but then he's going to ask what upset me, and then down the rabbit hole I go.

I pulled myself up trying to get back onto my bed. Failing, I slipped back down onto the floor. It took a few more tries for me to fully give up, deciding to stay on the floor.

I pushed my back against the wall, walking myself through how I was going to apologize. I felt a wave of anxiety rush over me as the thought of him hating me now rang in my mind.

I tried to calm myself down as I counted out loud, taking a deep breath, inhaling and exhaling every time.

I crawled towards my desk reaching my hand up to grab my sketchbook and pencil case. Not being able to reach, I stretched my arm a little further. Reaching the corner of my book I tried to knock it off my desk, not realizing I was pushing it right onto my head.

As soon as my sketchbook made contact with my forehead, I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

I couldn't bring myself to call Chan's name so I sat there pathetic with tears rolling down my cheeks.

I grabbed the stupid thing that hurt me and opened it to start on my sketch. The best idea I could come up with is doing a sketch for Chan and apologizing so it could at least take some of the pressure off me. Instead of looking at me, he would be looking at the drawing.

I started sketching while thinking about Chan. It was hard to disassociate while sketching since I was still feeling guilty about making him upset. I did a few sketches, throwing them across the room, dissatisfied with my work. I started on another one, finishing it, I felt a breakdown coming.

Not being able to get anything right. Nothing was looking how it was supposed to. I was drawing Chan in the waterfall when I first saw him, but something just looked off.