Kyungsoo
DARN IT. WHAT WILL I DO NOW?
Three days ago, the teachers have announced that we will have a talent showcase that will serve as our clearance for graduation. I know in myself that there's nothing I can show off to them.
"Arghhh" I forcefully scratch my hair which is now a mess because for three days now I am worrying on what shall I do in the talent showcase. I know I cannot back off since it is a requirement for graduation, I don't want to cause any problem with my parents regarding this. I just want to finish high school at peace and go to the university to study college.
Now, maybe you are wondering why I can do all of this things to me, it is because I am inside my room where I can freely express what I feel. I consider this as my haven because I have the freedom to do anything and I am assured that no one else can see me.
Yes, I am so afraid to show what I feel inside to other people because they might judge and I really hate it. I really do.
Maybe it is the reason why I don't have any friends at school. I felt like I am invisible to others. I am always the guy who will sit at the far end corner of the room and will not speak to anyone.
"Aish! Why I haven't thought of it before?" I murmured to myself as I grab my phone from my messed up bed.
After I got my phone I quickly dialed the person I thought of. I am totally wrong saying that I've got no friend at school, actually I had one. He is a year older than me and he's in college already. He is the only one I really considered as my friend, and I was hurt when he left me after their graduation. Now, I am trying that maybe he can help me with my problem.
The phone rang and waited for someone to answer it. It took a while when I heard someone talking on the line.
"Kyungsooooo!" judging from his tone of speaking I can say that he is really excited to talk to me. "I missed you Kyungsoo, it's been a while since you called me," he added.
"Suho hyung," I said with a sad tone.
"Omo. Kyungsoo what's wrong? Did something bad happen?" He asked me with full of concern on his tone.
"I guess you can say that," I heave out a deep sigh and then continued talking. "You know that I am graduating this month, right?" I asked.
"Yes, of course. You know I am so excited already because I know you are going to study here in the university. I can be with you again," he said that with full of enthusiasm. I can't help but smile because of his words. "Don't tell me you've got a problem with your graduation?" he asked.
"Sort of," I said. Then I explained everything to him about my problem.
He carefully listened to what I said. After talking I sighed again.
I am shocked to hear him laughing. He's laughing to death I can say that.
"Yah! Suho hyung why are laughing?" I exclaimed. "I am worried as hell here then you just laughed at me. What the fuck is wrong?" I told him while I hit my head on the headboard of my bed.
"Wa-wai-wait Kyung-Kyungsoo," I can say that he is gasping air because he laughed so hard. "First of all, I can't help myself laughing." He is breathing heavily still gasping air.
Now he started talking steadily. "I really thought you have a big problem because it is so rare of you to call me especially at 1 in the morning."
"Yaahhh! Hyung I've got a serious problem here you know." I said it like I'm a kid throwing tantrum.
He sighed. "Yah, I got it. Just don't squeal like a kid. Okay?" He asked. "Okay, hyung," I said in a calmer tone.
"I know you've got a problem on what you will do during the talent showcase. Also, you've got a problem doing or performing in front of many people," he said in a concerned tone.
"But you know what, you just have to face your fears or it will eat you alive, well figuratively, so just do it," he sounded like my mother.
I know I have to face my fears, but what will I do. STILLL AGHHHHH I don't have any special talent to show the world.
Dancing? Nah I cannot.
Acting? No way. Rapping? Not this one.
Singing? Hmm. I can sing, I can when I am at the shower. That is the only time I sang, because I know I am not good at it. I stopped thinking when I heard Suho hyung spoke on the line.
"Kyungsoo are you still there? Hello?" He asked.
"Yes, sorry for spacing out. Bu-but what will I do? What will I perform during the show," I said with the tone of dismay.
"Yah! Why don't you sing? I heard you singing in the shower one time and you are good," he replied.
"Wha-what? You heard me singing? Aishh it is so embarassing," now I sounded sadder. "Singing? Hyung you know I canno-" I complained but he cute off. "You are complaining now huh? I know you cannot dance or act and whatnot, so singing is your last and only resort," he explained.
"Fine, I'll do it," I sighed in defeat.
After a few more minutes we hanged up because it is really late already. I am thankful that I have him as a friend.
But the question is, "What will I sing?" I took me an hour thinking about it until my eyes felt heavy - and I give in and went to a deep slumber.
