(AN- what if Izuku had died instead?)
-
Katsuki stares at the dark abyss he assumes to be his ceiling. So many times he had laid awake at night staring at this ceiling, yet it seemed so foreign and far away. His blanket laid forgotten on his floor and his desk looked destroyed, with burn marks and broken pieces of what once was scattered all around it. Notebooks, at least twenty, maybe thirty, with messy writing on the covers piled up at the corner, some of them knocked onto the floor. A picture of him and Izuku stared at him from his nightstand, where his eyes refused to stray. A crumpled letter stays clenched in his fist, the reasons not to read it running low.
'It's too dark to read shit.'
Turn on a light.
'I can just read it later.'
No reason not to read it now.
'What if he says something I'm not ready to hear?'
Will you ever be ready?
He could think up a million reasons he shouldn't read it, but that's not what bothered him. It's the fact he thought up a million and one reasons he should read it. Izuku wouldn't have wanted him to wait, he's probably screaming at him to just read it. But Katsuki finds it hard, like there's solid lead in his bones and sand in his veins. Because, today at the reading of his "will", Katsuki couldn't keep it together. He cried on live television, in front of so many people that he had never shown even a smile to, he was utterly ashamed of himself. He couldn't find it in himself to want to cry even more.
All of the words from that letter are scorched into his brain.
"To Whoever it May Concern,
this will take the place of my will as I have no official documents, because I'm only sixteen. In this short letter I'll explain everything, because that's what you all deserve. If, for some reason, someone decides this letter is un-fit to read aloud I hope all the right people see this. I'd feel silly if I wrote all of this and there was no one to read it.
Anyways, I guess I should get started because there's a lot.
At the age of five, I was diagnosed quirk-less because of an extra bone in my pinky toe. That crushed every dream I've ever had, starting with my dream to become the number one pro hero. There has been no amount of physical pain that ever matched up to the feeling I had then, in that doctor's office with proof I could never be a hero plastered on a screen. Through those years as a quirk-less child I was tormented, not only by other people but by myself. I convinced myself I could still do it, even if I knew the truth. And, something that took a lot longer than I had hoped, I ended up forgiving all of those who had pushed and shoved me. No matter what they have done or what they have said, change will never happen if I never forgive. So, I forgive you. Even though I hated you for some time, I've never stopped loving admiring you.
It may confuse some of you why I ended up having a quirk, and most of you already know that. But, keeping it as brief as possible I was given this power. Someone saw me, someone saw the hero I wanted to be, and gave me this quirk so I could achieve my dreams. I may have worked hard to get here, but I never would've even come close if it hadn't been for the people who really saw me. I'll never get the chance to thank you, because it could never be enough to say the words "thank you". Know that I saw you just as much as you saw me. You helped me become a hero, and that's more than I could've ever asked for.
