UGLY DUCKLING; S.MENDES

..a blob..

I got home rather quick, normally I like to drive through town because I have Shawn with me. We like getting ice cream then sitting in my car and listening to the radio. After hanging for a while I drop him off at his house and then I go home. But I didn't have Shawn with me so there was no need to drive anywhere but home.

"You're home already?" I heard my mom ask as I passed her in the kitchen.

"Eh, I guess Shawn had a ride or something..." I replied as I ran up the steps.

"Well he has a car right? I always thought it was weird how he'd have you pick him up and drop him off. You know, he likes you right?" She said like she was one of my teenage friends.

"Mom. We're just friends. Plus he probably didn't want to waste the gas since he travels other places over the weekends and on break." I replied as I sat down on the top step.

"Oh...he's part of that Conmag thing and he sings right?" She asked as she came to the bottom of the stairs.

"It's called Magcon and yeah really well." I said, remembering him singing to me. He'd always make up random songs about me or about the stuff I was doing. Now that I think of it, it was really stupid. Ugh. His stupid rhyming and beautiful voice. I bit my lip again and turned my head away from my mom.

"I'm tired, don't bother yelling for me when dinner is ready. I'll be asleep." I lied as I entered my bedroom and shut my door carefully.

"Alright...sweetie just tell me if you wake up and get hungry!" I heard her yell after me.

I chuckled to myself. Hungry? As if...I needed to lose weight anyways. I didn't need to eat because I'm too fat anyways. Wow. The things boys can do...convince a girl she's too fat to be beautiful. I scrunched my pillow in my fists as I held my head in it. I could feel the dampness on my cheeks as my pillow soaked up my tears. I lifted my head out of my pillow and stared at my reflection in my mirror. The more I cried, the blurrier my reflection became, the blurrier my reflection became, the prettier I got because all of my imperfections blurred into one big blob that had no definition to it. The no definition made me realize that we're all the same. Every human being blurs into one blob, made of bones, skin, organs, emotions, personality, and all the knowledge in the universe. We're really the same, just different inside. And too many people ignore the fact that we're all human. We all make mistakes, fall in love, laugh and cry. We all try and make the best of what we have and do what we think is the best for ourselves. We all cope in different ways. We must appreciate the differences of every human being. Because in the end, we all want to be the best we can be and unfortunately sometimes we have to hurt people in the process. Maybe that's what Shawn was doing, he knew he could do better and he wouldn't deny himself the simple pleasure of someone better. And for that, I really do appreciate his choice- he wanted what was best for himself, and that's all I could ever ask for. That in the end, he'll look back and say he was the best that he could be, whether I'm in his life or not.