What's the worst that can happen when you're forced to co-captain with your rival?
Nova Shields can't stand Leo Hendrix. She hates his arrogance and obnoxiousness, that crooked smirk he does when he thinks he's right. Leo can't stand Nova's wits, t...
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LEO =============== 26/02/2003 Panay, The Philippines ================
What the fuck have I done?
Everything we've been through has gone down the fucking gutter, all because I couldn't keep my lips off of hers for any longer. Couldn't keep my fingers out of her either, apparently.
And now, I've had to lie my way out of it. I told her it was a mistake, even though it was the complete damn opposite.
I wanted it so fucking much that I couldn't think straight; couldn't think rationally. I definitely didn't think about the fucking consequences, how severely it will change things between us.
I really thought that lying was my only option, but I think it's made everything worse. I don't know how I can even look her in the damn eyes again.
I noticed her jolt a little as the words left my mouth. She said it might have been a mistake, I said it was a mistake.
Why, for the love of fucking God, didn't I just say the same damn thing as her?
Maybe it's for the best. Maybe I need to try and stay away from her, because the way she makes me feel is something completely foreign to me. I feel so vulnerable around her. She's the only person who's managed to break through the walls I've built around me, without even trying.
She is the last person I ever thought would cause these conflicting emotions.
There's just something about her, there's alwaysbeen something about her.
I used to hate it, I used to despise her. I used to despise way she always quirked her eyebrows and folded her arms after making a point. I hated that she was the one person who didn't back down to me.
Now? Now they're all just things I love about her. I love the way she puts up a fight, the way she doesn't take any shit. I love the dramatic sigh that heaves from her lips whenever I say something that pisses her off.
I even fucking love her stubbornness.
Now, the only thing that I hate is how fucking badly I want her.
I used to think that if she was out of the equation, my life would be easier. I think it was the fact I almost lost her twice that made me realise my life would be a whole lot fucking worse if she wasn't in it.
Now she's a part of it, I can't imagine it without her.
Thank God I haven't physically lost her, but emotionally, I think I have.
She probably doesn't even realise I'm leaning against the other side of the barracks door, battling the urge to dash back in and tell her that I was lying.
I can't, for her sake. She's been through enough, the last thing she needs to worry about is this. Us.
I sigh, removing my fingers from the handle and forcing myself away. I know I've got to face her again in a very short amount of time since North wants to talk to us both about Abe.
