Episode 4 season 1 - 1D oops🌚
Today one direction will be at the pension home and will be assigned to look after an old granny called Mary.
"I like older women.." Said Harry wiggling his eyebrows like they were twerking caterpillars.
"Don't you dare go there Harry... We're there to look after her Harry not make her have a baby." Said LIAM.
"But I thought we were going to the pen to look after dogs! What am I supposed to do with this leash now?" Said Niall.
"WE COULD TRAIN THE OLD LADY TO WALK LIKE A DOG!" Shouted Louis
"YEAH! Dogs are so cute! It's their mating season now 🌚" Said Harry with his eyes sparkling.
"Now listen boys. We have killed 2 people in 2 days lets not kill anymore ok ?" Said LIAM
"YES MA'AM!" Said Harry
The boys reached the office lady.
"Are u here for Mary Loo ?"
"Yes we brought her grand daughter called toilet roll." Said Louis smirking
"Louis stfu !" Said LIAM slapping him.
"Soz m8." Said Louis
"Room 669 bunch on clowns" said the lady sticking up her middle finger at the boys.
"THATS ONE UGLY MIDDLE FINGER ! IT LOOKS LIKE A SAUSAGE YOU MUREDERED BABE THE PIG MONSTER!"
Niall started laughing. And laughing. And laughing. Until he peed his pants so he went home to get changed and since they went with Liam's car LIAM had to go too.
"Don't do anything stupid Harry and Louis we will be back."
"Yes sir!" Said Harry
"Okay I'll try !" Said Louis
Louis and Harry walked down the corridor to the old lady's room and opened the door slowly. There was Mary Loo taking a poo while looking out the window.
"IT STINKS IN HERE ARE U SURE SHE ISNT DEAD ALREADY AND IS STARTING TO DECOMPOSE ??" Said Louis
"Her bottom is very saggy..." Said Harry
"DAFUQ DUDE DONT LOOK AT HER ARSE"
"K"
"Excuse me instead of saying I stink will one of you help me I have been stuck on this shitty potty for 4 hours now."
"Wow u have been on that a long time ! No wonder they call you Mary Loo !" Said Louis
Harry went to pick up the women off the toilet but dropped her once he saw that she had done runny poo in the toilet. Mary loo fell with her face in the runny poo.
"MARY LOO ARE U OK" said Louis.
"I Have my own shit on my face want do you think?" Said Mary loo
"Harry you did it. Wipe it off."
Harry wiped the shit off her face and helped her stand. He then had an idea. He was going to take Mary Loo on a walk. He tied the leash to her neck and pushed her off her rocking chair so that she was now like a dog on her hands and knees.
"Come on Loo let's go"
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU LET ME GO"
"Ah ah don't bark or I will get you a muzzle."
"WTF KID YOU ARE MESSED UP."
"So was your mum when she named you now stfu before I get a muzzle and whoop yo ass"
Said Harry fiercely.
"I'll teach you some tricks now doggy !"
Harry taught the dog/old woman how to sit and stand. Harry then got bored and decided to cook with her while Louis was smoking daisies outside.
"Come on let's cook!" Said Harry to the old woman.
Harry was turning the toaster on. He told the old lady to stick the knife in the toaster to pull the bread out but she got an electric shock.
"Oh." Said Harry
He then decided to take her grocery shopping to say sorry however she didn't bring her walking stick so HARRY let her lean on him. They were crossing the road when suddenly Harry saw a butterfly and let go of the lady and she fell on the road and started rolling like a potato. Niall and Liam were driving when they heard a thud. They saw an old lady flying over the windscreen. They realised that they had ran that old lady over. They checked on her but she started hitting them. They decided to head back to the pension home and give her her medication. Harry put it in her cups. Suddenly the old lady started twerking and jumping around. Harry then realised he had given the old lady a mix of drugs. She was very High she started hitting everyone with her walking stick. One direction took cover and hid amd called for help. The women hit the people who were trying to help her and killed them with her stick. She pulled a gun out her top and a knife out her socks and went on a kill streak in the pension home. The boys jumped out the window to save their lives.
They hadn't killed anyone this time but had caused an old granny to kill many people.
"BERNAARD THATS WAHT YOU GET FOR DUMPING ME AND MARRYING KATE WHEN WE WERE 14 NOW U SO DEAD!" Said the woman. She hoped to see 1D again they made her very happy and high and she also wanted more medicines.
Luckily Louis wrapped some weed up for her as a gift before leaving and left it under her pillow.
The end.
