Timing

"I Have A Name"

Everything went so well that afternoon. Carol even stayed to go see the furniture store. Abby showed her around and they talked like old times. It was nice having Carol back in her life again, and vice versa. They decided on lunch every Wednesday at Scotty's. So, from then on, they did. Every Wednesday.

Soon, months went by. Seasons changed and the weather with them. It was winter now and in those days, it snowed all of the time. Carol was hauled up in her house for two week's. She couldn't take it anymore. When you're home for so long, it really makes you ponder thing's.

That's exactly what happened with Carol. She had ambition before she was a wife, a mother... She found herself drinking a bit more than she normally did. She didn't like this version of herself. Seasonal depression wasn't exactly a valid thing yet but from the perspective we have now, one could say Carol had it.

Harge, instead of helping or talking through it with her, felt embarrassed. He was embarrassed Florence had to see her like this. Embarrassed that she didn't want to go to functions with him, that when she did, she was drinking too much.

There were countless fights between the two over this. Finally Carol just looked at him and she came out with it. "I'm unhappy Harge" she said, stone cold sober. They were sitting in the living room, in total silence when she said it.

Harge did not react. Not even a look of shock on his face. It was as if she were stating something obvious, something he knew all along. Like an old article she were reading that was about a week old. He knew it and it was old news.

"Well?" She said impatiently. He peered at her over his book. "Well?" He mimicked back. Carol scoffed. She couldn't believe the nerve of this man. "Well... I tell you, my husband that I am unhappy and you just look at me without a god damned care in the world and..." Carol got choked up. She nodded her head, understanding now how things were.

She sniffled. "So, I'm just... your property? Someone to take to parties? Have your children?" She asked, rhetorically. "I'm not supposed to have any emotions of my own. I'm supposed to be your doll, your slave... and be happy doing it" she said, coldly.

"You're making this out to be so dramatic Carol, honestly" he said. She shook her head and scoffed at his audacity. "No, really Carol!!! Other women... other wives, they know how it all works" he said. "How come my wife is the only one oblivious to it?" He scoffed back. "You are unbelievable" She said.

"I'm your wife Harge! I'm not your prisoner... your property!" She raised her voice. "I never said you were! And god dammit, I hardly think this is a prison!!! I just...want you to be... to..." he was at a loss for words. "To what?!?" She yelled. "I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND YOUR PLACE" he screamed, veins popping out of his head. There was a silence.

"My... place" Carol said in disbelief. "And what exactly is that Harge?" She said, numb. "To be my wife. To be Rindy's mother.." Carol cut him off. "Don't you dare. I am a DAMNED good mother to Rindy. You know that!" She protested.

"I..." he knew she was right. "I know" he said simply. "I just... want you to be my wife. Yes, I want you to go to business functions with me, holidays with my parents, my friends... I want you to socialize, make me proud. To put on parties and entertain our guests... I want you to do what Tommy's wife does, Sal's wife... Pete's wife" he went on.

"And yes, I want you to do these things without having to be drunk, without embarrassing me" he said. "Is that too much to ask?" He said, dead serious. "You wouldn't think so, if I were Sal's wife...Tommy's....or Pete's... or" she laughs. "Whoever the hell. But I am not. I am your wife and I have a name" she said.

"Do you really not understand?" She asked. "I don't Carol. Enlighten me" he said sarcastically. "Fine. When you referred to the women as you just did... you didn't refer to them by name. Just someone's wife" she said.

"So?" He asked. "What's so wrong with being someone's wife? My wife?" He asked. "You say this as someone who never gets referred to as Carols husband" she said. There was a silence.

"I am more than just your wife Harge" she said. "Of course you are. You're Rindy's mother, you're..." he couldn't think of anything else. "I'm what?" She asked, making her point. "What am I?" She asked.

"You're a Good homemaker, a Damn good cook, a..." Carol cut him off. "Oh yeah..." Carol laughed. "Exactly" she said. "Carol... this is how things are. I don't understand. You knew this, getting married to me" he said.

She scoffed. "No, I certainly did not know all of this" she shook her head in disbelief. "I don't know what you want from me Carol!" He raised his voice. "And I don't know what you want from me. Not your wife but me, Carol" she said.

"I love you, don't you know that?" He grabbed her arm. She wouldn't look him in the eye. He was persistent. "Huh?" He asked. She wouldn't respond. "Abby has a job opportunity for me at the furniture store" she said.

"I want to take it...I'm going to take it" she said. "And I get no say in this?" He asked. "You've had plenty already. It's my turn" She said, lighting a cigarette. "I don't like this Carol" he said. "That's never stopped you when I've said that I didn't like something" she said, coldly, scoffing and letting out smoke from her cigarette.

"Is this Abby?" He asked. Carol laughed out loud, throwing her head back. "You are unbelievable" She said, in disbelief. "No really, Carol!" He said. "You start seeing her again and all of a sudden these ideas show up and-" she cut him off.

"Don't you dare. I'm telling you this as a courtesy" she started walking away. She heard crashing in the other room. "GOD DAMN IT" he yelled, as he hit his head on the doorway. "GET BACK HERE!" He yelled. "I'm leaving. Get yourself sorted and for the love of god, don't wake up Rindy" she said bitterly, walking out to the car.