𝑴𝑨𝑺𝑲𝑺

4

..."She's standing on the line between giving up and how much more she can take"—Unknown

Iretiola's POV

I'm going to be headed to school on Sunday and today's Friday.
Yes, I passed my JAMB with an unimpressive score of 288. It's not much but it's gotten me admitted into the best private University in Lagos State.

I remember when I went to write it. I met an old friend.

************
"Ireti, wassup" Margaret asked. She used to be my best friend in Secondary school. She used to be the best thing that happened to me.

We were inseparable or so I thought till I realized that I was the only one who thought we were friends. She only became my friend whenever she needed me and that friendship ended the day I decided to stand for the truth against her.

"Heyy, Margaret I'm good, you??" I said with a fake smile "Good too, you've forgotten us,where have you been na?" She inquires "I had to study for my JAMB that's why" I answer

"It's a lie joor,you that's never scared for tests or Exams, you're now afraid of JAMB,tell another lie jor" she laughed "I'm sorry,gimme your number so I can contact you later" I say know it'll get her to stop talking.
She gives me her number and I save it knowing I won't make use of it. We say our goodbyes and depart.
***********
I still haven't texted her and I don't plan on it. Today, I'm going to visit a friend, and it's not Margaret.

I have decided to visit Olamide's grave.

I get to their compound,it used to be our compound and I knock on the door multiple times till it's answered by Simisola, Ola's immediate younger sister. She sees me and tears up, pulling me into a hug and I hesitantly wrap my arms around her.

People always said Ola and I looked more alike that she and Simi,we never saw it but everyone else did, especially Simi,she took me as an elder sister whenever her sister wasn't present.

She hesitantly let's go of me when I ask "where's your mummy??"and she gestures for me to go inside probably not trusting her voice not to betray her.

I make my way inside cause I know the way. How wouldn't I? It was practically my second home.

I enter the sitting room and I'm instantly wrapped up in a hug by her mum."Where have you been?" She asks "I'm sorry, I couldn't stay,it was too much" I barely respond "It's okay,so why are you here?? what made you remember us today??" She asks with a faux smile on her face and a tear rolls down her face whilst she stared at me probably cause I looked like her dead daughter.

"Ma,can I please see Ola's phone and can I know where her graveyard is??"
I ask emotionlessly and she asks why as more tears drop from her eyes. "Our videos are on her phone and I want to visit her today" I explain and she goes inside and brings the phone out and I turn it on after letting it charge for a few minutes.

"We don't know the password" her mum speaks up "don't worry about it ma, I kne— I know it ma" I reassure her. I transfer all our videos to my phone and hand her phone back to her mum who escorts me out with her famous chocolate cookies.

I get to her headstone and set the cookies down beside it along with my bag and I stare at the headstone.I trace my hand around it without saying or feeling anything.
I play our videos and reminisce about the moments I spent with her.

"Why did you go?Why didn't you wait for me?Why didn't you check up on me?Why didn't you follow me?Why did you leave the world?" I whisper to her headstone like I'm talking to myself.

I'm tired of not feeling anything,I want to feel something, anything, so I hit her headstone furiously."Why did you leave me alone?!Why was I raped?! Why does Ade have Cancer?! Why can't I feel anything anymore?! I'm tired, Iretiola is tired of leaving yet everyone gets to die except me,it's not fair.