Moonlight: Stars, Eclipses, & Full Moons

For Life

Lily's POV

"At this point, we're only prolonging the inevitable. The dementia has progressed so far that even if there was an effective treatment, his quality of life would still continue to decline. And after speaking with your father, it sounds like they decided a long time ago that his quality of life was priority number one."

Despite all of the signs being there, the doctor's words still felt surreal. The time we had all been silently preparing for, the time when things got worse, had come quicker than what felt true. I turned my eyes to Jaehyun, who had this look of defeat I had become so familiar with. I knew it had been difficult for him to stay in the backseat after dad decided to let a different doctor handle appa's care about a year back when things starting getting really bad, so I didn't even want to delve into his thoughts. We all knew it was for the best, but what's best is often the most difficult route to take. Just like right now.

"I know how difficult this must be for all of you, so if there's anything I can do to help, please don't hesitate to ask," the doctor adds after a minute or two of deafening silence. "We have plenty of resources for families going through situations like this."

Dad hummed softly as he smiled at her. "Thank you," he said. "I really appreciate all of you've done for us this past year." He had become surprisingly calmer the more appa's health seemed to decline, though I could often feel his sadness for us and the other people who were close to appa. 

She smiled and shook her head faintly. "It was my pleasure. You have a lovely family." After we said our goodbyes and thank yous, dad showed her to the door. That left just the three of us in the house, alone with the strangest most awkward feeling since him they gave us the puberty talk. 

"We should think about how we want to tell the rest of the pack," he said, using a softer version of his business voice. "I guess I should also finish finalizing things with the lawyer and other packs, make sure everything is ready for you guys. The doctor told me earlier that he could go any day now, and I don't want push any of my unfinished business down to you."

So this was it. We were about to lose our parents. I heard some people say knowing is better than something unexpected happening, but honestly, I can't tell if they're right. Either way, Fate was at play, right? I don't think knowing the method beforehand really soothed me that much in the end. 

"I left a list of things to do the funeral in my office. Not everything, but just some things that we discussed were important to us. We didn't want to leave you with all of these details to plan out," he went on, his calm aura radiating a little bit more than before. "I'll leave it up to everyone else to decide if they want to stop over and say their goodbyes."

"I'll call Minah when I get home. I'm sure she'll want to see you both," Jaehyun said, speaking for the first time since he arrived at the main house. It broke my heart to hear the slight quiver in his voice; it was like he was finally admitted to himself that the end was near. 

I had been as honest as I could be to Joon and Syaoran about what was happening to their grandparents, but I was also prepared for them to ask more questions after the fact. It was inevitable, especially when I still had so many questions of my own. "I'll bring the boys over too," I said with stinging eyes, plastering a smile on my face. 

He smiled back at us briefly. "Good." He exhaled and gave us both a sympathetic look. He then opened his arms for a hug, and this time, neither of us dared to roll our eyes before we obliged. "I love you guys, so much, and I'm so proud of you both. Don't ever forget that." Tears streamed into my eyes; it felt like we were saying goodbye already, and no amount of prior warning in the world could have prepared me for the feeling of my heart breaking.