History (Nathan Gardner) - Complete

Don't Tell Me It's Over

"Is that what you want?" Nathan asks me, still with that worried look. Of course it's not but.. how can we get past this? If he won't even look at me in the same way? Is he won't treat us the same?

"Well? Do you?" He asks again.. "Is it what you want?"

I simply stare back at him, waiting for the words to fall out my mouth, but before I even get a chance, he's getting in there first and giving me his own answer.

"Because I don't, of course I don't and I'm sorry I've been such an ass recently, you didn't deserve that.." he sighs before shifting over to sit beside me, taking my hand in his.. "I don't want to break up with you, I want you by my side whether it be a wife or a girlfriend..I don't really care, all I care about is us, is you.. and I want you here, exactly where you should be.. I love you so much and I can't think of life without you..."

"Nathan.. I.." I try but he continues before I can speak my mind..

"No.. just listen for a minute,  I know I've just said it before, but I am such an ass, and I know it took me a while to see you were hurting, I know I've been distant, I guess I was just.. annoyed.. you didn't want to marry me, and that is fine, but I'm not gonna lie.. it hurt a little.. but it's ok.." His hand gently squeezes my hand in his, like he's not wanting to let go of them.. "I know you have your doubts, it's understandable.. but if so ever change your mind, if you do ever want to be my wife.. any doubts you do have, I'd promise to wipe them away..one by one.. until you realise that, I'm here Katie.. I'm here forever.."

Wow. He sure has a way with words.. and boy does it make my heart flutter. He doesn't even know that I never even answered the question. He just went in a mood and hasn't bothered talking about it.. until now.

"Babe.. can I.."

"I can handle your rejection of marriage, trust me, I'll get over it.. just don't tell me it's over between us.. please Katie.." he whispers, before giving me a chance to speak.

"Nathan.. I don't want us to break up..I never did..but you have no idea how you've made me feel these past few days.." I sigh, looking away, but I feel one hand of his reach up and turn my head back to him, making our eyes meet.

"Sweetheart, I'm so, so sorry, I know how I've made you feel, I can't apologise enough for that, I swear all I want now is to make it up to you.."

"I just don't get it? I didn't even answer and you ghost me for days, you don't come and eat your lunch with me at work like you always do and then when we come home from work, you're straight up into your office and I don't see you at all until the next morning because I go to bed well before you even bother.. you don't even kiss me the way you used to.." I try and hold back the tears, as I watch his eyes flicker between mine.. "I just want us to go back to being us, I don't need a ring, I don't your surname to prove this, to prove to my parents, I just need you, and that's all I'll ever need, whether it be your wife or not, I just want us to be us.. how we are.. or used to be.."

"Babe.." he whispers, low and soft.. "God, I'm so sorry.." his hand rests on my cheek.. "I will do whatever it takes to make this right again.."

"I love you Nathan, only you.. I don't want to call it quits, but I just need you, to be you again.."

"And I will be.. I promise you.." his eyes flicker between mine again, before dropping down to me my lips.. "You said, I don't kiss you the way I used to?"

"Mhm.." I follow his eyes and glance down to his lips, as he begins to move in slowly.

"Then, why don't I start there? Hm?" He smirks, before he connects, his soft lips gently brush against mine, ever so soft, but I can feel it, I have that familiar feeling that I have craved so much. I melt into his kiss as his hands find their way to my waist, as he begins to explore my mouth with his tongue, the kiss becoming more heated, more needy. Oh how I've missed this. Missed him.