A Series of Extremely Questionable Decisions

Starting a Cult and Exams

"James, what the fuck are we doing?", Chazz asked as he, Zane, Alexis and Bastion followed behind a fast-walking James.

It was the day of the rank-up exams, where every Ra and Slifer hopeful had the chance to bump up their dorm status. Obelisks technically didn't have to take the exams, but most of them did anyway to prove that they deserved their top spots. Zane, Alexis and Chazz were three of those people. James was just taking the exam to avoid being bored. Bastion was required to take the exam as a Ra, and he would probably pass it with flying colors, but had said he wouldn't move dorms no matter what until he proved he was the best duelist at the school... Which with James around, would never happen, but James found his determination endearing. After dragging them all out of bed at an ungodly hour to do some unspecified thing before the exams started, James had dragged them away yet again down some forest trail. It took fifteen minutes of feeling like tired zombies and dragging their feet before Chazz finally regained enough of his brain cells to question his circumstances. James looked back and grinned at him when she heard his question.

"I'm so glad you asked, beautiful. If you must know, we're on our way to the forest to sacrifice this!", James declared, before pulling out a wooden dummy of some strange, crane-like bird from fuck-knows-where. Everyone stared at the dummy in confusion.

"What is that?", Alexis questioned.

"Yes, and sacrifice? To who?", Bastion asked. James's grin widened.

"Such eager learners you all are. This here is an ibis dummy. In ancient times, ibises were the divine symbols of Thoth, the Egyptian god of wisdom and magic. The ancients sacrificed ibises by the hundreds to ol' Thothy. They sacrificed so many in fact, that it's a miracle the damn things didn't go extinct! And since we're about to take an exam, I figured it would be appropriate to petition for some divine favor. So we're going to find a clearing, and we're going to do to this dummy what the ancients did to real ibises thousands of years ago; we're gonna mummify and bury it in a tomb. Or rather, we're gonna wrap it in some medical gauze I stole from the nurse's office and bury it in a ditch.", James explained light-heartedly. Her companions looked even more confused. Zane sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, which appeared to be his favorite thing to do every time she said some random shit, James observed.

" ... I ... I have no words.", Zane said exasperatedly. He didn't know how he still managed to be both surprised and mildly terrified of his girlfriend's antics, but he was. Bastion raised his hand. He wasn't about to fight against his best friend's crazy whims. He knew better than to argue with James. Trying to do so usually left him frustrated and mind-fucked, so Bastion had taken up a policy of 'go with the flow and hope you don't get arrested' when it came to James's schemes.

"I have a question; why are you using a dummy ibis instead of a real one?", the brunette boy asked. James frowned.

"Because real ibises aren't native to Academy Island and animal sacrifice is illegal under PETA's bylaws. And since I consider myself an animal rights activist and don't wanna get sued, we're stuck with the diet coke version of our glorious sacrifice to the old gods, AKA this wooden dummy I carved with a shiv made out of a rusty spork in my infinite free time.", James revealed. She grinned when she saw that they had reached the end of the trail, which opened into a clearing. She held the ibis dummy and the gauze up to her friends.

"Now, who wants to help me start the chants?"

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"I can't believe we just did that.", Alexis said as she and everyone else left the clearing to head to exams. They had just completed the sacrifice, and it was certainly... an experience. Zane nodded at his friend's words.