Hunger (Taekook)

Bonus Chapter- The Interview

Lmao haven't updated this story since finishing it almost five years ago. I just reread it and wanted to include this bonus chapter. I feel it ties everything together a bit better, but also gets the main message of this story across.

Enjoy!

•••••

We sat across from the same interviewer we did five years ago, a mere week or so after I had collapsed on stage.

The vibe was much different this time around. I wasn't itching to be hiding in a closet the entire time. I didn't feel suffocated, or weighed down.

I felt free.

"Welcome back, V. It's been a few years since the last time I interviewed you, and that was with the whole group."

I nodded. "Yes, I remember the interview well."

The reporter hummed. "You were the one who requested this interview with me actually. I'll admit, I was surprised. You have only about a week before your military service begins, I would expect you to spend time with your loved ones."

I gave a small smile. "I have one loved one with me today. Jungkook is off-stage."

"Oh!" The interviewer jumped up. "I would love to include him, would that be okay?"

Everyone agreed, quickly getting him setup, putting a microphone on him before he came and sat next to me on the couch.

He wore a fresh haircut, having chopped off his long locks in preparation for the military buzzcut.

"Welcome, Jungkook! Thank you for joining us as well."

My husband smiled and gave a small nod.

The interviewer cleared his throat. "To begin, I wanted to see how you two were doing, seeing as you both officially enlist next week."

Jungkook glanced at me, practically motioning for me to go first. He had made it clear that he was here for support, but it was still my interview, my moment to say what I felt I needed to say.

"It's a bit scary, you know? We've been there while our other members have enlisted, and it's been very emotional. Having less time to interact with our fans is also disheartening, as I get so much energy from them. But we also get to serve our country for eighteen months, and I know we'll be back to making music, and back to being BTS, before we know it!"

Jungkook nodded and smiled, clearly happy with my answer. He reached over and squeezed my hand.

The interviewer glanced at our hands before moving on to the next question. "Now, you two are married now, which, I would like to say congratulations on! Being a same sex couple anywhere is difficult, but especially in Korea. I'm sure you lost many fans and gained more because of it."

"Jungkook has something to say about this, for sure." I joked, watching his ears turn a light red color.

Jungkook cleared his throat. "It was scary for us in that moment. I remember having our meeting with Mister Bang about us sharing the news. After ensuring that we knew we wanted to go down this path, he gave us a hug and told us he loved us. That moment reaffirmed we were doing the right thing. Our fans always say they loved everything about us. For the fans who stuck around following the news, this was the truth. The fans who refused to listen to us anymore because we were in a same-sex relationship were not the fans we wanted supporting us anyways. They didn't support who we truly were and are. Marrying Taehyung was the best decision of my life, and it's an honor to share my love for him with my fans, and feel their support through all of the tough times."

I rapidly nodded in agreement.

The interviewer continued discussing the topic with us for a few more questions before their face got a bit more serious.

"Now, V, it has been over five years now since your collapse on stage. Myself, your fans, the world still don't know what happened."

I inhaled a deep breath, preparing myself for the reason why I requested this interview.

"As much fun as it is being interviewed by you," I began, hearing people in the room chuckle, "This is why I wanted to come today. It was time for me to discuss what happened, so people know they are not alone in the matter."

I took a moment to steel my nerves, Jungkook gave my hand another comforting squeeze.

"Five years ago, I collapsed on stage due to the side effects of an eating disorder, mostly Bulimia Nervosa, though there were some Anorexic tendencies in there was well. I would eat as little as possible until I realized I was starving. I would then stuff my face until I felt so... fat, and I would go make myself throw the food back up. I-I thought that my fans would only like me, and that my other members would only like me, if I was skinny, able to fit into this ideal image. I was so stuck in this mindset that I quickly became skin and bone. I was unstable when walking, I couldn't focus, I was spiraling."

I took another pause, looking down at Jungkook's hand in mine.

"All of these feelings also lead to self-harm. I, uh," I released a nervous breathy chuckle, "Jungkook actually rescued me one time when I tried to kill myself. That's what helped turn me around was Jungkook, soaked in my blood, crying over the thought of losing me. It made me realize that he did care, he did want me around. He assured me the other members did too, and it helped me to get to a better place mentally so I could get the help I needed."

"And how are you doing now?" The interviewer asked with somber eyes.

I looked up at the camera with a proud smile. I have been sober for 1,763 days. This is equivalent to a little over 4 and a half years. I feel great. Sure, I still think about it from time to time, but my Jungkookie makes sure I'm never mentally in a place where I will actually lose all the sobriety I've worked for."

The interviewer genuinely smiled for the first time. "I'm proud of you for coming so far, V, and I appreciate you coming to share your story. Do you have any advice for those who may be in a similar boat?"

I hummed in thought for a moment while I formulated my thoughts. "This is something that Jungkook told me when I was struggling. This is something that is not just to ARMY, but for everyone." I cleared my throat for what felt like the thousandth time during this interview. "Stars cannot shine without darkness. You're a star. You're my star."

"You're our star," Jungkook added meeting eyes with me while they sparkled.

"Well said, both of you. Now, let's talk about-"

••••

"To you, for sharing your story," Jungkook raised his glass of champagne in the air , clinking it against my glass of water.

I vowed many years ago to not drink, as drinking often brought some of those thoughts and feelings back up. Jungkook, in solidarity, also quit drinking unless it was for special occasions.

He deemed this was a huge moment in my life, hence the champagne.

After the liquids poured down our throats, he grabbed my glass, setting it down next to his.

He cupped my cheeks in his, looking at me with sparkles in his eyes. "I am forever so proud of you, my love."