Hunger (Taekook)

Chapter Nine- Regret

"Good morning, Taebear." Jungkook smiled as he walked into my bedroom, a tray in his hands. I sat up in bed, eyebrows creased together.

"What's this?" I couldn't help but smile seeing Jungkook so happy. I adjusted the blankets covering my small body as he walked closer to where I sat on the bed.

He set the tray down on my lap. It had a mug full of steaming tea, along with a plate, which held a few small pancakes, some eggs, and a few slices of bacon. A little glass cup next to the side held warm syrup. It was my favorite meal. The pancakes even had a few strawberries and blueberries on top.

"I made breakfast for you, but please, only eat as much as you want."

"Why did you do this for me?" I asked as I hesitantly reached for the crispiest piece of bacon, breaking it apart with my hand and sticking a small piece in my mouth.

He shrugged. "Is there a problem with me cooking for my favorite person ever?" He leaned forward and pecked my temple, making me frown. He was so happy, I didn't want to ruin it.

I decided to let him be happy for a bit longer as I started to consume small bites of the meal he prepared for me. It was delicious, but I knew I wasn't going to eat much, which would also upset him.

He must've seen my internal struggle on my face because he reached for my hand as I went to grab the last piece of bacon. "Are you still hungry, or are you only eating to make me happy?"

I dropped my head, unable to meet his eyes. He sighed and took the tray off of my lap, not before taking the tea off and putting the mug on my nightstand. "The tea will help the wounds to heal better, so I do want you to try to drink some of that, but Yoongi already agreed to finish off whatever you didn't want to eat, so don't worry about finishing it to please me."

I gave him a weak smile and nodded. His head tilted to the side slightly as he reached forward and held my hand. I felt the lump in my throat form, making me have to force the tears in.

"Taehyung, about what happened last night..."

"Which part? The part where I tried to kill myself or... the other part."

Jungkook's legs bounced up and down anxiously. "The other part."

"What is there to talk about?" The tears were getting harder and harder to contain, threatening to spill out at any second.

"Well, we should talk about what happens now."

His eyes were sparkling, but his face also wore a look of nervousness. I didn't want to hurt him, but I knew I had to. "Nothing. Nothing happens now."

"Tae, we kissed. You asked for it, and we basically made out. That obviously means something to the both of us, so it has to lead to something!"

I looked down so he wouldn't see the tears forming in my eyes. "It was just a heat of the moment thing, probably the blood loss talking on my part."

I saw his body slump at my words before he swallowed harshly, speaking slowly. "So, you just asked me to kiss you because of the blood loss? You were, what, hallucinating? Not thinking straight?" Don't make the joke y'all I swear-

I nodded, chewing on the inside of my cheek.

His voice dropped, getting darker the longer the conversation carried on. "Well, can I ask you something then?"

"Sure."

He took a deep breath, and I couldn't help but feel the guilt swarming me again when I heard how shaky it was. I knew him well enough to be able to tell that he was on the verge of crying. I wanted to cry with him, tell him I was sorry for hurting him, but that I can't have him getting too close to me. All I do is disappoint.

"You have to be honest."

"I will be." I still wasn't meeting his eyes, and I frowned when I realized he had pulled his hand away from mine.

"D-Do you regret it?"

My head lifted up so I could meet his eyes. My heart shattered at the sight of tears on his cheeks. "Huh?"

He furiously wiped at the tears spilling from his eyes as he shook his head. "Do you regret kissing me?"

I took a second to ponder how I was going to respond. In reality, I enjoyed it very much, but internally I was struggling with what I knew I needed to do versus what I wanted to do.

He obviously didn't think I need time if I was going to say I didn't regret it. "If you didn't regret kissing me at all, you would've said so immediately."

"Jungkook, I-"

He held up a hand, and I saw him swallow again. He closed his eyes as a few more tears slipped under his lashes and onto his soft skin.

"Jungkook, please listen. I-I don't regret it, but I'm also not exactly thrilled that it happened either."

"You're basically saying that you regret it. Fan-fucking-tastic." THAT'S NOT WHAT HE'S SAYING KOOK but whatever.

"That's not what I'm saying!"

Jungkook shook his head rapidly and gripped the tray with a tight grip and left my room, closing the door with his foot, leaving me to embrace the echo of the door slamming, before I was overcome with silence.

•••••

Yeah I really don't know what this chapter was.

Anyway, I decided to write during the Super Bowl cause ya girl has no cable in her apartment, even though my team was playing. Oh well *sighs heavily*

Love you all😘

(But especially my one and only soul mate XXXWAFFLESXX 😘😘💜)

See y'all next chapter!

~KJ💜