Hunger (Taekook)

Chapter Seven- Fake Appearances

"Are you ready for this, Tae?" Hoseok asked next to me, making me take a deep breath. I wasn't, in reality, but I knew I couldn't sit at home while the others were busy with rehearsals and interviews. So, I tagged along to be a part of the interview we were having today.

I looked at myself in the mirror, frowning. They gave me a baggy shirt to tuck into my black skinny jeans so nobody could see how skinny I had become. It only made things worse for me. It made me look fat, bulky. It made me feel heavy.

I felt a hand around my waist, making me jump. I turned to see Jungkook staring at me with concern in his eyes.

"I hope you're not thinking about what it looks like you're thinking about."

I took a breath and dropped my gaze to the floor. He knew me too well.

"Taehyungie, we talked about this. You are not fat, or baggy, or heavy, or anything less than incredibly handsome. The interview won't be too long and then you can change into whatever you want and we can head home, okay?" He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear as I nodded.

"O-O-Okay. Thanks, Kookie."

••••

The interview started, and I had to force a smile onto my face for the first time in over a week. The company made sure I was sitting in between Jungkook and Namjoon, since they both bring me a sense of comfort, more than the others, including Jimin. I'm sorry Chim, don't hurt me 🤭

"Hello! We are-"

"BTS!" We did our usual opening, and Namjoon cleared his throat to be ready to answer some questions.

The interviewer asked us questions about our latest album and what we plan on doing now. Namjoon promoted our tour, along with our UNICEF campaign.

I saw the interviewer's eyes scan us and land on me.

"So, V," the interviewer began, making me sit up taller, but more stiff. "I'm glad to see that you're here. I watched the clip of you collapsing on stage, and I just assumed you wouldn't be at the interview here today."

I shrugged it off. "I have been resting for over a week and was feeling ready to come back and start getting into our busy lives again."

"So, care to tell us what made you collapse? And are you hurt anywhere? Will you be able to perform at the awards show next week? I know the fans are really curious as to what happened."

I was bombarded with questions, but I chuckled lightly. I could see Jungkook's and Namjoon's eyes scanning me as I spoke. "As far as injuries go, the only thing that is injured is my pride. That is definitely something you don't want to happen, but much less in front of thousands of people and during a concert that was being filmed. The incident was trending on Twitter, apparently, and it just makes me feel more embarrassed every time I see it show up on my feed."

Namjoon chuckled next to me. "So please give V some privacy and do not share the video."

I silently thanked him, making sure to do it in person later on, but the interviewer didn't buy it.

"But, what exactly happened? Was it exhaustion? Lack of sleep? Did you lose your balance?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat, seeing the whole group tense up. "Us Idols live a hard, busy life. There are a number of factors that could've contributed to that happening. But it's in the past now, and I just hope it doesn't happen to anybody else."

Namjoon nodded and spoke up again. "He has been taking all of the proper precautions, and our management has made sure that we are all well-rested and as healthy as can be." The managers looked as if they were about to intervene from behind the camera, but I gave them a pleading look. I didn't want to arise more suspicion.

The interviewer decided to drop the subject and continued asking us questions about our tour and our latest album. It was too close.

I spent the rest of the time fidgeting, nervous that he would bring it back up. I wouldn't know what to say at that point.

"Great! I think I have everything that I need! It was excellent getting to speak with you all, and I hope that you all stay healthy." His eyes met mine once more, making me want to curl up into a shell and hide myself from his intense gaze.

We stood up and bowed once more before the lights and cameras shut off. I hurried offstage and to one of the dressing rooms, locking the door so I was alone. I had ignored all of the hands grabbing at me, the people calling my name. Eyes had followed me the whole way but I ignored them all, more concerned about how utterly disgusting I felt in that moment.

Within seconds, I heard frantic knocking. I put a hand tightly over my mouth to prevent them from hearing the sobs being released through my body.

"Tae! It's just me, please let me in."
Jungkook's soft voice made me sob even harder. He was too good to me. He did too much, and I couldn't figure out why. I was worthless. Why was he so determined to make me want to live? I didn't see the point anymore.

Except that I liked him. It had hit me like a rock just last night. Everytime I see him I blush uncontrollably. He makes my heart do backflips. Whenever I see his bunny smile I want to kiss him.

He would never feel the same about me.

The knocking slowed down, but was still present. "Taehyungie, please. I just want to make sure you're okay. I can hear you crying."

I uncovered my mouth and took a few deep breaths, unable to keep the air in. I unlocked the door, wasting no time in dragging Jungkook in the room by his wrist, locking the door, and collapsing into his arms. He instantly held onto my waist, rubbing a soft hand through my locks of hair. He always knew how to calm me down.

"I-I-I'm j-just..." I started, unable to speak through the sobs.

Jungkook pushed my head into his shoulder, only making me cry harder.

"Shh, it's okay. We're all alone. Cry it out. It's okay to cry. I'm here for you. Shh, it's okay."

It's okay.

He continously repeated those words and after a minute, I felt my body relax.

Maybe it is okay.

I leaned back so I stared at him. I gave him a small smile. He smiled cheerfully back at me, wiping my tears with his thumbs.

"You're beautiful, Tae. Okay?"

I nodded sheepishly, my cheeks a bright red.

"Stars can't shine without darkness, Taehyung." He pressed a gentle kiss onto my forehead and gave my hand a squeeze. "You're a star. You're my star."

•••••

Lol school starts tomorrow and i wanna die already whoops

^^^ I relate too much. This week is hell for me so i'm so so sorry if I don't update until this weekend. 💜

You all are so beautiful, inside and out, and I love you all.💜💜💜