Keeping Secrets

Chapter Seven

It's been two weeks and I haven't made any decisions. I have been cheating on people I love. And in a way, I've been cheating on myself, on my believes and way of life. Am I the kind of person who will cheat on someone I love, someone who I've been in love with for two years?! All of these things go through my head as I sit in bed next to Calvin while he sleeps. Damn, he passes out quickly after sex.

"Calvin, I'm gonna go," I whisper and kiss his check as I put the rest of my outfit on.

"Bye..." he says half-asleep still, I smile and roll my eyes.

"Is he using me? Am I using him?" I say out loud to myself on the car ride home. As I walk up to my apartment building my phone buzzes notifying me a tweet mention, 'I'll check that later' I think to myself and keep walking. in the few short steps up to the building, I got many strange looks from other people walking, which is a lot considering I live in New York. 'I wonder what that's about' I think to myself, but ignore the faces people keep giving me.

"Hi, baby!" I yell as I walk in, not sure where Ed is located in this abnormally large apartment. I don't get a reply, "Ed?!" I yell again, still nothing. I walk into the kitchen and see a note from Ed. 'Funny, why didn't he just text me?' I laugh to myself.

"Need few things for dinner, be back by 5:30" the note says. Its almost 5:30 so he should be home any second now. Then the door opens and Ed had two grocery bags in each hand.

"Hey babe, what's for dinner?" I smile, he looks down and ignores me, "Ed? Are you ok?" No reply. "hey talk to me!" I plead walking up to him, but he pushes past me. I stand in between the living room and kitchen, absolutely bewildered as to what is going on. "Whatever," I shake my head, giving up on trying to get him to talk, retreating to the couch and try to find something on TV

****
Dinner was completely silent. Believe me, I tried to get him to talk. Nothing worked, "So, how is your album coming along?" I tried asking, no response.

"Have you seen any good movie trailers? I'm in the mood to see a new movie." Still nothing.

"Do you want dessert? I could bake some cookies after dinner," Nothing I said worked so eventually I just started talking to him as if he were going to answer. That didn't work either but I keep trying, "hey, what movie did we pick out for tonight? Was it "Love, Actually"? Yeah it was , its Thursday! Thanks for reminding me," I exclaim as I plop myself on the couch and turn on the movie on Netflix even though I have it on DVD, I was feeling to tired to find it. As I hit play, I look over at Ed who is walking towards the bedrooms.

"Hey! Come watch with me!" I pat the spot on the couch next to where I am seated. He stays, but sits in the rocking chair across the room, "or sit there, whatever."

Throughout the whole movie, there is just silence, you might even say awkward silence. As soon as the movie ends Ed gets up and leaves the room, I quickly follow.

"Yeah," I yawn, "I'm pretty tired, I'm gonna go to bed," I turn into the bedroom and realize Ed is turning into the guest room.

"Aren't you coming?" He opens the door and walks in, slamming the door hard. "Ed?" I say, standing in shock. I fall to the floor and cry. Why is my life falling apart at the seams? What did I ever do? When do I get off of tour break to I can get away from all of this? In the middle of my thoughts I fall asleep on the floor. I wake a few hours later. After I remember why the hell I'm on the floor, I grab my phone from the floor and go to my bedroom. I slink into the bed and pull the blankets over my body. I blink on my phone and see the Twitter mention I was notified for hours and hours ago and forgot about. I click on the button to view it. My phone takes its sweet time to load the whole tweet but I see its from Calvin. Suddenly I see the whole thing and my world falls apart. This is why Ed is acting so strange. This is why I was getting harsh looks walking up to my house after seeing Calvin. This is why career is going to come crashing down in burning flames.

@Calvinharris: "When @taylorswift13 is your fuck buddy. loving life"