A Single Rose (a Valentine's Story)

Chapter 11

Is that what I'm doing now?

The question bounced around my brain, pounding at the inside of my skull. I cradled my head, easing the ache brought on by my confusion and tinge of sadness. The little voice wouldn't shut up, What if it's just a trick? After all, who could actually like you. It's just a stupid prank. Maybe you should just give up.

And, for a moment, I felt despair overwhelm me. It was true, who could ever like me? Maybe I should just give up...

Then the smallest of whispers stirred in my heart, so faint that I could barely hear it. What if it isn't? What if someone does?

It took me a moment to recognise it. It was Hope, which had once been my strongest internal voice, but over time and been so beaten, battered, and betrayed, had retreated deep within me, and only now had tenderly awakened and stretched out a tentative tendril.

Maybe, just maybe. For a moment I let my mind run wild as I imagined what it would be like if it was real. To have someone like me.
I'd find him, whoever it was, standing at the end of my so-called "quest" and he'd turn and smile at me, and I'd realise in my heart that though we had barely interacted he was 'the one', and he'd call me "Emily" in the tenderest, most heart-warming of tones as he ardently expressed his feelings for me in a heartfelt poem and-

Don't get ahead of yourself, my inner critic said wryly. You're not in some romance novel. Real life just isn't like that, sadly.

Okay, yeah, so just maybe my imagination had ran away with itself. In reality, if there was some guy who liked me at the end (whom I doubt exists) and if it wasn't a prank (it probably is), he'd either end up being jerk, take one look and realise that I looked better from a distance, or else he'd say some cringey pick up line like "Are you WiFi? Cause I'm feeling a connection."

I shuddered at the thought with a sigh. I mean, it probably was a prank, and even if it wasn't... could it even still end well?
After all, it was hardly as though there were any kind guys (decidedly no supposedly "nice" guys thank you very much!) whom I had been bantering or really chatting with much lately. And let's admit it, school really doesn't have much scope for romance, not the long-lasting, life-filled one I longed for in my heart. But then, neither does the real world, not from what I can see...

Argh, it's so difficult! Do I follow the clues at the risk of it being a prank? Do I follow it at the risk of 'him' being some slimebag? 
I cradled my head. I just don't know.

Then Hope, ever so faint, piped up again,
Do I follow it at the risk... the risk that it ends well? The risk, that it isn't a prank?

The unanswered question, along with my internal debate, could have gone on for longer, but my thoughts were interrupted by the bell for the next period. Already?
Wow. Since I had a double study session, I could stay seated, but it mentally moved my train of thought, bringing me back to the reason I was here, to study.

I couldn't believe that a whole period had passed so quickly, but then as I had the thought I also had the startling realisation that the reason it had gone so fast was because I had actually been enjoying myself - something which hadn't happened for a while. It had been fun to ponder the note and solve the clue. And the reasons... well, I didn't fully believe them, but they made me feel less alone, more seen (in a positive way that is).

There may be more clues to solve and 'reasons' to read if you keep going... Hope sneakily suggested.

Okay, fine, I inwardly smiled to myself with a shake of the head, Fine! Yes I'll do it. But. I can't get all naive though, I have to keep edge of caution...

Having resolved my inner conflict, for now at least, I opened my laptop with a sigh, I really did need to get going on my work now. And, besides, I wouldn't be able to check if my guess for this clue would he correct until later anyhow.
Glancing it at again, I mentally nodded.
Yup, the 'barrier that divides Rusty and other kitty pets from Firestar and other clan cats' definitely had to be the wooden fence surrounding the school garden.
But I wouldn't know until first break, which meant I still had to get through the rest of this study period and then a single Math period.

So long to wait, I inwardly sighed, then shrugged. Can't be helped though.

But before getting stuck into my studies...
I allowed myself one more look at the note, my eyes lingering on the last line.

Reason #3: Your smile when you are reading a good book.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Author's Note:
Hey there! Thanks for reading my story, it means a lot to me ^_^.

Sorry for the short chapter this update, I've been really busy lately, so I figured that a short chapter was better than no update, and to be honest I wasn't really sure how to expand it any more.
I have actually already planned out the last few chapters of this story, but am struggling to figure out what to write for the in-between/filler/plot-progressing chapters!

Anyhow, my apologies, I hope everyone is having a blessed week!