Summer Nightmares

Twelve

Regina Spring

"You teenagers believe it's cool to fight and show off your moves and you may think you're right. But if the next minute someone's bleeding on the floor and you're the reason why, Miles Dunne, think again." Miguel said calmly while the three of us stood outside our ears to the door behind which they were talking.

It was unusual and strange because usually Miguel would've shouted at Miles. But he didn't. Probably because Miles was hurt too. Also probably because it wasn't his fault this time, in a way.

We had been in Camp Lakesville for four days and there wasn't a single day we weren't getting shouted at or getting in trouble.

Trouble followed everywhere we went.

About twenty minutes later, we heard footsteps coming towards the door and we stumbled outside before Miguel could see us. The way back to the cabin was grieving in silence. Maybe it didn't have to come to this. We weren't the best people you'd meet and feel cheerful with. We weren't the kids who understood what we were even made for. And I wasn't the best person to think all these things in my head so I stopped.

Mia had this attitude I never understood and she told me I would one day but that day never actually came. She'd have this big wide smile and when she'd walk into the room, everything would just lit up.

She was sunshine.

The brightest star I'd ever seen.

The kindest soul I'd ever known.

The happiest girl I'd ever met.

The saddest girl I'd ever seen, the last time I saw her.

I was the dark, the nightmares, the bad things.

The star that didn't shine.

The coldest soul I'd ever known.

The saddest girl I'd ever met.

The loneliest girl I just couldn't leave.

"Regina, have you ever thought about leaving it all behind and running away with someone?" Mia asked, lying on the green grass field of her grandmother's house. We'd visit her grandmother sometimes when things would get bad. When we wanted to be in love with each other and stop pretending to be someone we were not.

"Have you?" I asked, looking down at her. I was on the little swing her grandmother had set up way back when she was a child. It felt like memories I'd never actually had.

"I asked you first!" She said and sat right up facing towards me.

"I would if you would." I replied after thinking about it for sometime. What I meant to say was a big big big 'yes' but I didn't. I was never good at telling the people I loved the most that I loved them more than anything.

I kept things to myself. I shouldn't have kept things to myself. I never got to tell her that I loved her to the moon and back. She never got to know that I loved her to the moon and back.

When she left I wrote her letters telling her how much I loved her. Telling her I wanted to run. I wanted to go wherever she wanted to with her. Letters I never got answers to. Letters I got back were my own. The only thing she ever wrote back was the most heart-wrenching thing I'd ever read.

Regina,

Stop sending the freaking letters. I feel nothing for you. I was just playing around with you. I knew we'd be leaving in a few months and I just wanted to have some fun. I don't love you and I never will. That's the truth. Everything before this was a lie.

It is not my fault you never saw the signs. I didn't reply to your letters. I left you alone at parties. I kissed Alyssa on your birthday and you said you forgive me. (even Alyssa couldn't stop laughing at this)

And look at you, Regina! How could you ever think I'd fall in love with someone like you? You're nothing. You can't even fit in at your own house. You've written the cringiest things someone could ever read! This is all so freaking stupid. Grow up.

Mia

I could've been the dark, the nightmares, the bad things.

The star that didn't shine.

The coldest soul I'd ever known.

The saddest girl I'd ever met.

The loneliest girl I just couldn't leave.

But I wasn't nothing.

I wasn't stupid.

I wasn't a thing to be joked about.

I wasn't in love anymore.

I wasn't a kid anymore.

"Miguel said one more fight and I'll go home," Miles said and lied down on his bed, sighing. "Do any of you know where exactly they've kept our phones?

I looked at the boy in front of me and his audacity to get in and out of trouble feeling unaffected. He was something. He didn't care. I wished I didn't care.

"The bigger cabin we found at night." Sydney said casually and we all gave her the look that screamed 'how'. "I-I was talking to Em and she blurted it out."

"Do any of you guys want your phones back?" Miles asked.

No answer.

He waited.

Still no answer.

"Guys, I want- no, I need my phone and I can't do this alone!" he said innocently. "I need your help!"

"No more trouble, Miles," Kai said without looking at him. He was staring into the unknown or something. "We don't want you out of this camp in an embarrassing way."

"Pass. I got a song to work on tonight," I sighed. I wrote better when I was sad and remembering Mia made me sad, sadly. So I thought about being productive and who knew maybe I could be a great songwriter because of Mia.

"Sydney?" he asked in a small voice.

"I want my phone too. I'm in," she said after thinking it all through and Miles grinned, saying ten 'thank-yous' in a minute. They planned it all out, from the time they'd sneak out to how they'd get in the cabin to how they'd come back without getting caught.

"Wish us luck guys!" Miles said. They were about to sneak out in five minutes after the councilors had completed their last round and went to their cabins.

"Good luck," I said and looked at Sydney who showed no expression. She wasn't scared, happy or excited. She didn't express herself much. I wish I was like her.

"On second thought," Kai said and sat right up on his bed, " Watching you get embarrassed and kicked out of the camp would be something I'd not want to miss"

"Kai freaking Young, have a good night because I promise the coming days are going to be a nightmare for you!"

And that was the last conversation I had before I went back deeper into my nightmares and wrote a song in 10 minutes.

Sadness made me do things I would have never done either way.