"Like A Dog With A Lost Owner.."[𝙙𝙖𝙯𝙖𝙞×𝙘𝙝𝙪𝙪𝙮𝙖]

chapter 4

Chuuya pov:

We were watching a movie on the big black TV scrreen. Higuchi was asslep on Gin, atsishi looked half asslep beside aktugawa, dazai wide awake beside me, he looked, rather boerd. I looked at him for some minutes "he didn't abound me... " I thought to myself, the idea made me feel some kind of warmth inside of me, I smiled gently at the thought.

-ok you guys take your lovers into the guest bedrooms and sleep tight. I said yawning

-wait you mean atsuhi is sleeping beside me??

-yes, yes that's what mean, know hurry up he looks uncomfortable as hell.

He looked at me annoyed but I could see a small smile forming on his face "kids thesse days"

everyone went into the guest room but dazai didn't, he was still sitting on the sofa staring into the TV screen. I was a bit confused, and could sense that he's somehow sad.

-dazai...?
-huh..? What's wrong chibi?
-nothing, but why are you so grumpy all of a sudden?
He looked at me with a smile on his face it looks like his normal everyday fake smile he gives anyone to let them know he is alright when he really isn't alright, but I'm not anyone I know this man clearly and he is not ok.

I walked closer to him and satt on the sofa beside him, I stared at him warmly, I knew what he wanted, but I just gave him time.

-so?
-.... Dazai looked at me confused at first but gave me a warm smile which made my heart flutter a bit.

-y'know me so well chibi...
-duuuh, know spill the beans.

He looked at me and gave me a small smile until it faded away slowly. I looked at him worried and could see his hand shaking up a bit, I h3ld his hand with no quiseten needed and ensured him he's safe.

-I'm just.... He started and looked me directly into my eyes. I looked back at him, still having a smile on my face.

-continue, don't worry about anything else besides I'm always here to protect you mon amour.

-i feel guilty...
-about what?
-about you.

I looked at him in utter shock, why would he feel guilty for me.

-why tho is my question??

-well... When I left you.., and let you suffer in the mafia and I couldn't protect you from the people who made you suffer alot.

I've never in my entire life thought he would apoligaze to me for this.

-aw dazai, I won't lie I did go though a thought time, but it's alright, you probably left for a reason and I'm fine with it. Plus I'm not a kid you protect, I can protect myself just fine, I chuckled.

He looked at me kinda pained with the thought of me telling him it was alright, it was basically written all over his face.

-hehe, I know you can protect yourself just fine chibi
-so, what is it thays bothering you?

-it just isn't alright nor is it fine either for me to leave you, I left you because of a stupid reason I honestly sometimes regret leaving you all alone, that day we reunited again, I was so happy but I knew you would be angry and sad with me. I don't like that I left you for a person that is know gone, I just..., I could see him building up small tears in his dark brown eyes, it really hit me in the heart, I even started small crying myself.

- are you happy in the detective agency? I asked

-what do you mean chibi..? He answered

-just answer my question.