Everything but her

You, me and the words unsaid

Aarushi had successfully completed the first day of that one month session and some of the things were crystal clear to her. Firstly, she still loved Virat. Secondly, she needed to talk to him. Thirdly, it was time she stopped listening others and forget the whole thing.
She reached home in a haste and matching her watch with the timings of New Zealand, she called up Virat.
'Hello', she began.
'Hello, Aarushi', Virat responded.
'Are you busy?'
'No. We have just come back from lunch. You want to talk something important?'
'No, just casual talk. You know like we always do', she sounded sad.
'Aaru, what is the matter?'
'No', she thought, 'don't make me weak, Virat.'
'Aaru?'
'Yeah, nothing I mean how are you?'
'I am fine but you don't sound fine to me. What is it?'
'No, no I just wanted to know if everything is okay between bro and you.'
'Yeah, Jinx was pretty cool in handling everything and the culprit has been caught.'
'Oh, ok.'
'What ok? Don't you want to know who it was?'
'Yeah, sure. Who was it?', she tried so hard to be interested but her voice clearly showed that she did not care.
'Our manager, Raju.'
'Ok.'
'Are you fine?'
'Yes, why?'
'You seem as though this has nothing to do with you. Aren't you happy that he has been caught?'
'I am but how can his being caught assure that something of this sort would never happen again? I mean it is the thought process of people that had to change. They have to stop being hypocritical.'
'Yeah, but a culprit deserves to be punished.'
'He is not a culprit alone.'
'Ok, Aarushi let's leave it at that. You are really not in a mood. So how did the fashion show go.'
'Fine, I think.'
'I am sure you would have been on fire.'
'No, nothing like that but I assume that people liked my collection.'
'You'll do great. Don't worry.'
'Thanks.'
'Now, tell me what is up? Why have you called me?'
'Nothing just normally you know', she sounded cautious.
'Aarushi, we know each other in-out. I know something is troubling you. And if you don't want to tell me it is fine but don't keep it within yourself. Just find a person whom you can talk to.'
'No, it's nothing like that. Virat, I still think I can say anything to you.'
'So say it then. You know I am never gonna judge you or anything.'
'I know that. So, would you like meet me after you come back from this tour to India?'
'Yeah, sure. Though your brother might kill me but anyways, anything for you.'
'Still scared of him, huh?'
'Always am. He is your brother after all.'
'Ok, so maybe then we can talk. Fine?'
'Yeah, but seriously tell me are you ok? For the hundredth time.'
'Yeah, for the one thousandth time.'
'I don't believe you.'
'Well, it's your choice.'
'Your voice seems as though you are trying hard not to break down.'
'Well, you are just thinking things in your brain.'
'I know I am not, Aarushi.'
'What do you want to know Virat that how I am? Well how are you? How does it feel to be going back once again when we all had moved on? How does it feel to...', and she broke down.
'Aaru? Are you crying?'
There was no reply. Just sound of sniffles. Virat had not done any good by probing continuously.
'Aarushi, talk to me. Please, don't cry. I just can't take it you know.'
'I am not crying Virat', she answered wiping her tears.
'Ok, let's talk about something else.'
'No, I am telling you it is okay. I was such a fool that I called you up and disturbed you. I am so sorry Virat. Now I have spoiled your mood as well.'
'Hey, you can never do that. Okay? And we are best friends, you need to tell me if something is wrong. Now just stop crying and eat a chocolate from my side.'
'I'll not eat dark chocolate as you always advise me to. I want to have chocolate caramel.'
'Anything', Virat laughed.
'Ok, I am going to have one. You take care. Bye.'
'Bye. Take care you too.'
Virat was filled with a void after talking to Aarushi. He had been surprised when she had not expressed any anger, disappointment or sadness before and now after talking to her he knew she had hidden it all along inside her. And finally she had wanted to let out those bottled up emotions but she had failed to do so even before him. Why? Had they become so distant or was it only because she was worried about him.
Aarushi, on the other hand, felt better. Somehow, she had let out things. Not completely but she had. And she felt better talking to Virat. She knew he might have felt so bad when she did not speak her mind completely but this was all she could manage on the phone. She also felt selfish because she had not thought about him and just called him up. He was on a tour. She knew it could affect his performance though she knew he was far better a player to do so. But still, she felt a little selfish.
There were, thus, many a words left unsaid and this loss of words caused bludgeoning emotions on both the sides.