'Turn your head and let us go, I'll learn to breathe on my own.'
When pursuing dreams trumps love, soulmates are forced to separate on bad terms but there'll forever be something tying the memory of their love to Lennon Elliot, two small versions o...
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In the depths of his new home, Niall paced back and forth in the master bedroom still decorated sparsely with not a lot of decor as he went through every possible scenario in his anxious mind. As an overthinker, he couldn't simply come to a complete decision instantly like some people but instead, he needed to consider every outcome to ease the anxiety that's always pumped through him since he was a kid.
And although he's worked on methods to ease it, nothing has worked... nothing but one thing he's been missing for years. She always seemed to ease him without needing to do anything but be there, like a good luck charm he wished to carry with him every day.
He spun around as he approached his full-length mirror, his reflection getting larger until he was almost touching the reflective glass. Beginning to reapproach the open door to his room his mind battled itself with no way of being able to slow it. He desperately wanted to see her and the kids... their kids. It still felt weird for him to say that.
It had been a few days since he last saw the three of them, he'd been submerged in moving his life into a new environment yet they'd never slipped his mind. Part of him had hoped for Aoife to reach out to him first but the rational side of his mind kept reminding him that she had no obligation to ever text or make contact, that the weight to try was now on his shoulder.
And he desperately wanted to show Aoife that he was stepping up and that he cared deeply about their children even if their existence came as a huge shock to his system. No part of him felt annoyed or irritated by anything, he was simply in shock but also awe... and maybe slight jealousy towards himself upon seeing the life he could've built with Aoife if he hadn't been so selfish.
But if he had to spend the rest of his life proving to her that he wasn't going anywhere ever again, he would do it without a second thought. He put her through hell and back, it was the least he could do to try and mend the damage he caused.
After spending a few days with zero contact pondering over how he could next see them, his new home came to the forefront of his mind as not only a perfect excuse but something he could use to prove to Aoife he was in this for the long run. That he wasn't going to turn around and run for the hills when things got tricky. He wanted to invite them over. Maybe prepared their favorite meal, or put on a movie that was appropriate for the kids, but he was just terrified to ask.
His deep-rooted fear of rejection was rearing its ugly head in his mind, there was nothing he could do to stop it except like the anxieties run their course. He'd either beat through them or crumble under the weight of them – there's no telling until the time comes.
