Hyunlix oneshots

A ghost of what once was

"Everytime I see him I die a little bit on the inside. At first it was because of love, but now it's cause I know the truth. Was any of it real? Was I just a fool following blindly just cause my naive heart told me to? Probably. Seeing you now hurts, cause I don't see the person I fell in love with. I see someone else entirely. Someone strange. A ghost of what once was."

Hyunjin looked down to his hands as he fidgeted with his fingers. This feeling was unbearable. 

For the past week Hyunjin had been locked into his room. He couldn't get out of bed. He hadn't eaten anything and it sure felt like it. Still nothing could hurt as bad as his loss. 

"Hyunjin?" Someone knocked on the door. Hyunjin didn't answer. He didn't want to talk. 

"I'm coming in." Someone said and twisted a key in the lock of Hyunjin's door. The door slowly opened getting Hyunjin's full attention. 

"I got the key from Han. We were getting really worried so I thought we'd kinda have to just barge in." The voice belonged to Chan. He was holding a cup of ramen that made Hyunjin's stomach make weird noises. 

"You didn't need to come in. I'm perfectly fine." Even tho Hyunjin knew that was a huge lie and anyone could tell he was a mess, lying felt like the best option.

Chan just looked at him. His eyes were reflecting Hyunjin's poor expression and watery eyes. Wow. Had he managed to make Chan cry? That was insanely impressive. 

"Hyunjin please. You're not. I mean look at you! You're just a shell left of what you used to be." Chan said emphatically while slowly approaching Hyunjin.

"Look, I don't quite know what happened, but I'm sure it will pass eventually. Felix wants to make up with you." 

That name made Hyunjin shiver.

"I didn't start this. I did nothing"

"I know. But you can help us restore it all. Maybe you and Felix aren't together anymore, but that doesn't mean we all couldn't be friends."

"Doesn't it tho?"

"No. But now we have to get you out of this room. You're going insane. Even Felix is worried." Chan said and placed the ramen on Hyunjin's bedside table. 

"Felix, huh.." Hyunjin bit off. 

"If Felix cared he wouldn't have left me. If Felix cared he'd be here. If Felix cared he would still love me! IF FELIX CARED HE WOULDN'T HAVE FUCKING HURT ME!" Hyunjin cried out. He curled into that same little ball he'd basically lived in for the past week and the tears began. After the first four days he had lost the ability to cry properly, so it felt quite refreshing. 

Chan's heart broke a little hearing how much pain was in Hyunjin's voice. It was truly the most emotion filled cry he had ever heard. Chan didn't know what to do so he just stood there biting his bottom lip out of stress. It was a habit of his and normally the other friends would have noticed and tried to calm him down. 

"Chan?" another person asked behind the door.

"Yeah? Come in." Chan invited.

Lee know stepped in accompanied by Han. They both looked startled by the sight of Hyunjin. Chan could see how Han grabbed Minho's arm a little tighter. 

"Is he ok?" Han asked barely audibly.

"No. But we just have to help him over it." Chan said. He had now sat next to Hyunjin patting gently his back. 

"Cause he WILL get over it." Chan said directly to Hyunjin while seeking his eyecontact unsuccesfully. Hyunjin did lift his head just the tiniest bit from his knees. Not fully tho or even enough to see Chan.

"I'm scared.." Han whispered to Minho with huge worry in his eyes.

"I know darling, but he just needs time." Minho said and leaned his head against Han's.

"But he's been like this for a week...he hasn't even eaten or slept. This is not our Hyunjin..." Han said with the same shy voice looking at the unfamiliar boy crying next to Chan.

"I think it's time for me and Han to go. Update me later, ok?" Minho said after seeing the fear on Han's face.

Chan gave him a accepting smile and went back to Hyunjin.

"How about we have lunch now." Chan suggested.

Hyunjin was still a mess but the hunger and unslept nights were starting to take over so he looked up a Chan with red eyes and gave him a small nod. That smallest bit of movement gave Chan so much joy. 

"I don't think it's smart for you to see him right now." 

"I know, but I really need to."

"Felix he's been such a mess. It wouldn't help. And he's finally getting some sleep. I don't want to wake him up."

Hyunjin heard a conversation while still being half asleep. Wait. Felix? Why was he here? No no no this can't be happening...

"Chan you don't get it I love him! I need to see him! I've been worried to death there past seven days and I can't bare it aymore!" 

Hyunjin heard fast footsteps that made him sit up on his bed.

"Felix...." 

There they were. Looking at each other. Felix had that same terrified look on his face that everyone had had when meeting Hyunjin lately. Felix'x heart sank. He was looking at a pale boy with dark undereyes, messy hair and the saddest look he'd ever seen. What had he done? 

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That was intense. I don't think I'll post more parts to this one, but I hope you enjoyed. I was feeling dramatic so here you go haha.