In "Miles Away," a spin on "8 mile". Jimmy, faces struggles with battles, family, and living arrangements. His love interest, Trish Chanel, is the sister of Future, the battle host. Trish hangs with The Free World even though her brother and his cre...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"I'll be back later, alright, Lilly?" I murmured softly to Lilly, her disappointed expression hit me like a ton of bricks.
I had to swing by Wink's place because he insisted on hashing out some stuff about the studio time Roy offered me. It took some convincing, and honestly, I'm tired of rehashing it all. Battling, music—just the whole deal, you know? I'm drained, but Wink insisted I come over and discuss it. Maybe taking the studio time could kickstart something for me, but I'm not even sure anymore.
Trish's unexpected encouragement about the battles that one night threw me off. I mean, she used to loathe me, man. If I told anyone she was pushing me to battle against her own crew, they'd think I was messing with them. I couldn't wrap my head around it. It felt like she was setting me up for embarrassment on stage again. I'm torn, dawg. I'm just exhausted from all this second-guessing.
As thoughts of Trish swirled in my mind, that strange feeling about her crept back in. But the feeling was more dull now...I knew it would just take some time to get back to normal. I should be happy about that....thats what I've been waiting for, to feel that weird feeling fade away easier... Was I really happy about it? it left this unsettling void in me.
Forget about it, Jimmy. Be grateful you're not tangled up in all that shit no more.
I shook it all off, focusing on Lilly.
"You're leaving?" Lilly whined.
Lilly's pout and her plaintive voice pierced through me. "...Yeah, I'll be back though, alright? I promise. You'll be fine with 'Ma." I assured her.
I hoped she would be. My mom seemed to have turned a new leaf since Greg split, swearing off booze and all. She even made a whole breakfast for me and Lilly this morning... which is extremely unusual for her. It's refreshing, seeing her act like a responsible adult instead of chasing after some deadbeat who endangers both her and Lilly. I hate it when she falls into that trap.
"What if Greg comes back?" Lilly's question twisted my insides.
"...If Greg shows up, stay in the room and wait for me. You'll be alright... I promise. Just wait for me, Lilly," I whispered, planting a kiss on her forehead. "I'll be back soon."
Her nod and quiet 'I love you' felt like a goodbye that tore me apart.
As I left the house, my mom bid me farewell. The cold March air stung, but waiting at the bus stop wasn't so bad, given my whirlwind of thoughts.
The bus arrived sooner than expected, and I got on, settling into a seat by the window. To distract myself, I plugged in my headphones to my WalkMan, pulling out a cassette from my pocket. The one with Iz's beats was the only one that I had... I sighed, not wanting to dwell on any of the shit I've been complaining about, but if I was heading to Wink's to commit to studio time, might as well get some lyrics down, so I pulled out some folded papers from my pocket.
It saddened me that writing felt more like a chore than a passion these days. It used to be my escape, my sanctuary. Now, it felt like just another burden weighing me down. It's just... people have been pushing me too hard, you know?
As the beat thumped in my ears, I let myself get lost in the rhythm, letting it drown out my worries, even though they were the very things I was writing about. It was the only way to ease the weight off my shoulders.
The bus rumbled along, I couldn't shake the feeling of unease that gnawed at me from within. It wasn't just Lilly's worried expression or the thought of facing Wink's relentless enthusiasm about studio time. No, there was something else lurking in the back of my mind, something I couldn't quite put my finger on.
Maybe it was the memory of Trish's encouraging words about battling. She used to despise me, and now she's cheering me on to take on her own crew? It felt like a setup, a trap waiting to snap shut the moment I stepped onto that stage. I was torn between wanting to prove myself and the fear of humiliation.
And then there was Trish herself. Despite her sudden change in attitude towards me, there was still that lingering feeling of... something. It wasn't as intense as before, more like a dull ache in the background. I told myself it would fade with time, that I should be relieved it wasn't as consuming as it was these past few days. But deep down, I felt melancholy about the whole thing...Maybe because it was extra stress off of my shoulder, you know, me and Trish not fighting like we used to. But that just brought another thing to worry about: new emotions surfacing, ones I'm not even sure I want to delve into. I mean I do...it's just kinda freaky that I feel this way about...Trish. She's Trish..
But enough about that. I had Lilly to worry about, my promise to her weighing heavily on my mind. The thought of Greg showing up again sent a shiver down my spine. If he dared to come near her, I swore I'd—
No, Jimmy, don't go there. Stay focused.
I pushed the thoughts aside, focusing instead on the cassette in my hand. Iz's beats always had a way of soothing my troubled mind, even if just for a moment. I popped it into my Walkman and let the music wash over me, drowning out the noise of the bus and the chaos of my thoughts.
With a sigh, I unfolded my papers and began writing. But as the beat thumped in my ears, I found myself slipping into that familiar rhythm, my pen dancing across the page as the words flowed from my soul. Despite everything, music was still my lifeline, my anchor in a sea of uncertainty.
And as the bus rumbled on towards Wink's place, I couldn't help but cling to that glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, things would start looking up. That maybe, amidst all the chaos and confusion, I'd find my way back to myself.
