Memoir

Prologue ~ Changing weather

You were agitated, pacing back and forth through the halls of your mansion, a whirlwind of thoughts engulfing your mind.

You weren't used to being agitated.. fearful even. You married the head of the most notorious criminal organizations after all.. fear wasn't really in your vocabulary.

Who would dare cross you? Who would be stupid enough to try and pull something on you?

His enemies? He'd crush them in a blink, they wouldn't dare.

The police? He has it in his pocket.

A random homeless guy? Burglars? You have a gun on you at all times so you'd be able to defend yourself easily..

That's why when he found you unconscious on the floor on the brink of death, he was mortified. The invincible Mikey fell on his knees powerless when the realization hit him.

He failed to protect you.

..But you pushed through. Thankfully you are as resilient as a cockroach but now one question remained embedded in his brain..

"who did it?"

He checked the security footage but the power was cut off so he had no visuals. He asked you what happened but you couldn't remember anything, and by the amount of substance that was injected in, he couldn't blame you for having memory gaps.. it was, after all, a miracle you were even alive after that.

He had no trail to follow, no idea of who or how did they or he or she even got in the house, a house that had military level security. He swore on his life that he WILL find out.. but in the meantime, you couldn't be alone anymore. Clearly, it was too risky, and you are not a risk he is willing to take or leave up to faith.

You needed a bodyguard until he could find the culprit. Someone to be your shadow, someone to be around when he couldn't be, someone that he could trust and capable enough to take care of his greatest possession.

Someone like..

///

Mikey: "I need you to guard my wife"

Ran: "your- .. excuse me?"

Mikey: "That will be your job from now on"

Ran: "I didn't even know you had someone.. "

Ran sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose feeling a headache coming in

"I don't think that's a good idea, I'm good at torturing people not protecting them"

Mikey: "This is not a negotiation. If I said that THIS is your job.. you dare question my decision?"

Mikey's stare was as hollow as it was intense. He was a very intimidating man and Ran, although he was known to be pretty intimidating himself, knew better than to cross Mikey. He had to oblige

Ran: "Nah.. I'll do it"

Mikey: "Good. I want you to never leave her side, she was targeted before and if you can find out anything about the incident I will sure make it worth the hassle. Wherever she goes, you go. And if something happens to her, you're dead. Got it?"

Ran's mouth twitched and he was biting the inside of his lip so hard that it drew blood. He hated it, all of it, his demand, the way he had to submit to it, his threat. He wanted to punch the loving god out of this man, but Ran valued his life and even more, his lavish lifestyle that Bonten provides for him, so he nodded in acceptance instead.

Mikey: "I'm trusting you with the only thing I have left to live for.. don't disappoint me"

Ran: "I won't"

///

The silence in the house was deafening, and it drove you insane.

A bodyguard.. so not even now would he bother to stay with you himself.. he just did what he always does. Threw some cash and called it a fix, of course.

You sat down on the couch staring blankly at the ceiling, reminiscing.

It wasn't always like that.. HE wasn't always like that.

You met him when you were both only 16, back when he was full of life, when he had hopes and dreams. Back then, he was a leader that you admired, someone that you knew you could count on, that always had your back and everybody else's..

But then his sister died.. his vice captain followed soon and lastly.. his best friend.

After that, something snapped in him.. he was never the same. He became ruthless and started killing people just to make a point. He killed his former gang members and friends, he started Bonten and built it into the name that terrifies anyone who hears it these days.

For some reason he chose to spare you. You didn't feel all that special because after all, he also kept Sanzu around since Toman.

But what made you special was the way he used to be with you.

At first he would randomly climb on your window at night and crawl into your bed. He would stay in your arms for hours not saying anything, just letting you comb your fingers through his hair endlessly.

He became addicted to the peace that came with you, and you.. you fell for him.

Hard.

Maybe it was because you've always liked them broken. You always had that "I can fix him" type of attitude and it never ended the way you hoped but with Mikey?

It ended with you two pledging to love each other for the rest of your lives.

Was he fixed?

Not even close, if anything, he'd gotten even worse.

Did you keep your promise?

No, none of you did, it was a lie in the first place.

You didn't love him, you loved the memory of his former self, a ghost of the past, and he? he didn't love you, he loved the comfort you provided by being the only constant in his life.

And now you were stuck.

Mikey is never home, he never calls, rarely texts you.

You spend days, sometimes weeks alone. It would drive anyone insane at one point.

Unhappy was an understatement, you were miserable.

You wanted a way out..

But what were the options, really?

Mikey is not your typical husband, he is a a murderous sociopath that killed anyone that dared to look him the wrong way.

You can't just ask for a divorce because god knows how'd he react. He wouldn't kill you, that's for sure, because this was personal, he'd want you to hurt. You knew better than to risk it so you remained quiet.

What choice did you have?

Only one.

You knew he'd never grant you your freedom and you'd rather die than keep living in this prison he so meticulously created for you, so one night you decided to take the matter in your own hands.

You had medical training so you knew exactly what to buy and exactly what dosage you needed for your heart to stop.

Funny how the first time in ages you felt alive was the moment you were taking your own life.

The only thing you haven't planned was..

surviving.

And now you have a manic husband turning the world upside down to find an enemy that doesn't even exist.

You couldn't tell him the truth, of course. He'd be crazy enough to chain you to the bed just so you would never try to hurt yourself again.

And now you had a bodyguard so trying it again has gone out the window so.. new plan.

The bodyguard, whoever he may be, needed to go.

And you'll make sure it'll happen fast.