The Reckoning - Book Two

Chapter Twelve - Demwyn

My training leathers felt too tight, too constricting, as soon as I get to my room and shut the door I tear the jacket off and throw it to the floor.

I swear there was no one else who could frustrate me as she did. Why did she have to be so vexing when all I was doing was try and help her?

I pace back and forth shoving my hands into my hair and pulling at the strands, the tug on my scalp close to painful.

How was I supposed to help someone who acted as if my help was torture? That was the word she had used to describe my lesson, torture, like she knew the first thing about torture, true torture.

The image of her screaming and thrashing in her nightmare flashes in my mind and I pause.

Was that how it felt? Was she being tortured in her nightmares?

Quirin had said she refused to speak about them, too scared to talk about what she saw. Just the look on her face and the haunted expression in her eyes was enough to guess that what she saw when she slept was terrifying.

Were the training exercises just a physical representation of that?

I wasn't trying to hurt her, I was just training her like I had be taught, like my brothers had been taught, like every child gets taught.

I drop my hands to my sides and stare up at the ceiling.

I knew how to train men, soldiers, not a sleep deprived fragile woman.

To be fair I had been going easy on her, not making her do as many reps, giving her more time to rest in between sets. What more did she want from me?

Was I supposed to hold her hand and walk her through every exercise? Did she expect me to behave like my love sick brothers and fall over my feet trying to make her happy?

I was doing her a favour, a service, I was the only one trying to actively help her and she treated me like I was her enemy.

A knock at my door makes me grind my teeth.

Couldn't I have just a moment to myself anymore?

"Come in." I grit out, picking up my jacket and setting it over the back of a chair.

"Your Majesty." Varis says with a bow as he enters. "Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to speak to you about hosting a small dinner."

"A dinner?"

"Yes, as I mentioned previously, you need to select a wife. I suggest we hold a small dinner for yourself and the chosen as well as several of the high lords that remain in the kingdom." He replies and even just the thought of having to attend a formal event has me clenching my fists at my sides.

"I have not forgotten Varis. I just do not think it is an appropriate time to host a formal dinner." I reply, doing my best to not bite out each word.

"Of course Your Majesty, only in this dark time and having the selection postponed I thought it might be a good idea to invite the chosen to a dinner so they may be reminded of their importance to our kingdom and their eventual futures here with us." His answer is quick as they always are, like he knew what I am going to say even before I do and has replies ready and waiting.

"Why would we need to remind them of that? They are here in the palace, we have already told them the reason for the selection being postponed. I don't feel the need to explain it in more detail." I say, feeling the fragility of the back of the chair as I grip on to it, trying my best to hold back my already agitated temper.

"You may not Your Majesty, but seeing as their lessons have been cancelled and they are left to their own devices I fear they may lose the training they have received and return to the old versions of themselves. We would not want that to happen. If we are able to hold regular events where they would need to put their newly learned skills into practice and be reminded of why they are here and what is expected of them, then I feel it will truly cement their training and when the time comes for the selection to take place they will all be ready." He says quickly and I am tired of this man and this conversation.

"Then start their lessons again, if they need reminding then surely having lessons will be the best way to do so." I say simply.

"Of course Your Majesty, if that is what you would like. I am sure they will all benefit from receiving more instruction from our tutors. And then perhaps we can hold the dinner at a later time." He smiles but I don't return his enthusiasm.

"Very well." I say, knowing he won't let the issue drop unless I agree and I so desperately want to be rid of him that I would be willing to agree to many things at this point.

"I will arrange everything immediately." He says with a small bow before turning and leaving me alone.

I move towards my dressing room preparing myself to wear one of my newly made suits, no longer allowed to wear my usual training leathers, because that isn't how a King should dress in his every day. I am no longer allowed to wear only black because it wasn't the colour of a King. No, now my wardrobe was full of dark colours in emerald green for Wyndelle and Maroon for the Wyrnwood trees that grew in our forests, gold embroidery littered each jacket to signify our strength.

A heavy sigh escapes my lips as I stand staring at my options. How easy it had been to dress before, now it seemed I was making a life changing decision every time I walked into this room.

It was bad enough being forced into a suit for formal events and functions now I was bound to wear them every day.

The only reprieve I had was during my own training every morning and the afternoons when I would train Daella. Or attempted to train her.

I let out another frustrated sigh at the thought of seeing her again tomorrow, mentally preparing myself for her lack of appreciation and general presence.

Her emotions were volatile and she still hadn't mastered how to shield them, either that or she was doing her best to project them at me.

Every now and then she would try, try and reel everything into a tight ball but it didn't truly stop me from sensing her. It was more like a thin veil, shielding her, so I would only sense a fragment. In those moments it was a stark difference to the constant onslaught I was becoming used to.

If I was a better man I might offer to teach her how to shield her emotions.

But I already knew what kind of man I was.