Even though I didn't want anyone to know about the pregnancy just yet, it was like a weight had been lifted off my chest after I'd told my Mom. I started to get excited about them and even found myself browsing the internet for strollers and cribs, nursery designs and ideas.
Joe had his blood taken at the doctors office the day before my 12 week appointment. My Mom offered to attend the appointment with me and I was thankful she did, it was nice to share the experience with someone else. We did the usual checks, checked in on baby with an ultrasound and then took my blood. The difference between 7 weeks and 12 weeks is crazy, they look so much more like a baby.
You could say I was an anxious mess for the 11 days it took for the test results to come through. I'd just landed back in LA from Turkey after performing at EXPO 2016 in Antalya. I saw the email whilst I was in the company of my team so couldn't check it for a few hours until I was left alone. It was on the back of my mind until I had the chance to open it and I kept going through the different scenarios.
DNA Paternity Report
The alleged father is excluded as the biological father of the tested fetus. The probability of paternity is 0%.
My heart broke as tears flooded my eyes. This isn't the result I wanted. Now, I guess I need to tell Odell.
I would have loved to have been able to work out my frustrations with a little Brazilian Jiujitsu but I was left to work them out on the treadmill instead. It definitely didn't work the same however as I still felt extremely frustrated.
I sat on the couch later that evening, my leg shaking with Batman curled up beside me as I stared at Joe's caller ID. I need to tell him, he deserves to know.
Demi: You available to come over?
I sent the message and then relaxed back against the couch, combing my fingers through Batman's fur as he moved onto my lap. He curled up in a ball with his head resting on my bump, his eyes staring up at me.
"I wonder how you're going to be when baby gets here" his ears twitched slightly as I spoke to him.
Joe: I'm in New York D. Everything ok?
I released a breath and dialled his number instead of replying. He answered almost immediately.
"Hey D, you okay?"
"Erm, yeah. I-I got the results today" I felt sick as tears flooded my eyes. My heart was pounding against my chest.
"Right" I could hear the nerves in his voice.
"I-I'm sorry, Joe, but you're not the baby's father."
"That's okay. At least we know. You can tell Odell now."
"Yeah, and I don't know how too."
"I know he lives in New York and I'll be here for a while, if you need any support, just call me. I'm still your best friend, D" my lips tugged into a smile.
"Thanks Joe."
I wasn't able to take a trip to New York over the next few weeks due to concert commitments in Mexico and due to the fact that I was putting off telling him. I will do everything at this point to avoid it, even though I know that he deserves to know about them. He is the biological father.
