After hours of investigation, I finally realized that I should've probably checked the diners security system. So I go back to The Crystal Ball and meet with Crystal herself again.
Hugh: Hello again.
Crystal: Well look who's back. More Vodka?
Hugh: No.. I'm only here for answers. SHOW ME THE SECURITY FOOTAGE NOW.
Crystal stares at me unfazed. However, I don't back down. If it comes to it, I would even piss on her right now to assert my dominance.
Crystal: And what for hun?
Hugh: I TOLD YOU LAST TIME! I'm investigating a crime on this street. Your footage serves as evidence.
I can't believe this. People keep making me repeat myself. I hate repeating myself.
Crystal: Alright, I guess I can show you some of it.
Crystal takes me back to the security room. On the desk is your average monitor set up.
Crystal: Here it is. Now what time is it you're lookin for?
Crap, I actually don't know what time the crime happened.
Hugh: Uhmmmmmmmmm well you see, I don't really knowwww. Just flip though the past few days until you find 2 guys fighting outside.
Crystal: Now hold on, that's a lot of footage. I didn't really agree to this.
Shoot dang it, time to activate my persuasion techniques. I pull out the perfume bottle that I was hiding between my ass cheeks and spray my eyes with it.
Hugh:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IT BURNSSSSSS!
Crystal: WHAT IN TARNATION ARE YOU DOING?!
Hugh: DAMN YOU JAPANESE CHERRY BLOSSOM AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! PLEASE SPARE ME I'M IN PAINNNN AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
Crystal: OK OK!! I'll show you the footage! Go clean your eyes off, holy shit.
Hugh: AAAAAAHAAAAAAAAGHHH THANK YOU.
Looks like my tactic worked. I'll see the footage, but at what cost..?
I rush to the bathroom and fill my eyes with a better liquid, water. Now I can see. Ish.
Crystal: Alright, while you were gone I found the clip. It's not fully in frame but you can see the fight.
I look at the screen but the whole thing is kind of blurry. Not because of the camera quality though, but because my eyes are still burning.
Hugh: Thank you, but I can't see anything right now, and I need to show this to my boss. I'll have to take the footage to go.
Crystal: Hun, you can take a burger to go but not video from my security camera.
My eyes tear up. Partly because she told me no but mostly because I probably gave myself pink eye from the shit particles that stuck to the perfume bottle.
Hugh: Please.... I need this.... just this footage...... please crystal... take pity on me...
Crystal: Man you're insane. I'll give you this clip but just because you're a detective on the job.
She makes a copy and I rejoice. Silently though, she mustn't see weakness in me.
Hugh: Thank you again, I will be forever indebted to you.
Crystal: Y'know I actually need some help moving out an old stove. If you could carry it some that would be nice.
I walk off with new found evidence and a new eye infection. You win some, you lose some.
Crystal: Excuse me? You just said you're in debt to me. Don't ignore me!
Usb in hand, I leave the diner and drive back to my job. Once my vision clears I'll be able to catch the criminal in his criminal acts.
I reach Donna's office and hold up the usb
Boss Donna: What did you find?
Hugh: Only a video of the crime scene. Heh I know, you can applaud now.
Boss Donna: I'm not applauding your ass until you solve the case.
At first I thought she was joking, then I got a bit furious.
Hugh: I'm would shove this usb down your throat if it didn't have evidence on it.
Boss Donna: See that's the energy I was looking for. Show me the video.
I stick the usb into her computer. After the ride over I can see better but the burn is still there. This'll be fun to explain to a doctor.
Hugh: Let's finally see what happened.
The security footage pops up and 2 men cume onto the scene. They keep walking but only stop when they're partly off screen.
Hugh: You're kidding. I can barely see what's going on!
Boss Donna: Ayo shut up.
The men seem to be yelling at eachother and then one gets aggressive. They fight and the other guy gets hit onto to the ground. Just as expected, the criminal did the fortnite emote and carried off his friend.
Hugh: it's hard to see much but I think I could run a face matcher for the victim.
Boss Donna: Well, goodluck.
I'm about to take the usb out when another guy walks toward the crime scene. It's Cleetus.
Boss Donna: Who's this?
Hugh: A witness. Cleetus Kickass. I talked to him already.
Like he said, Cleetus simply stood on the scene. What I didn't expect though was for him to suddenly drop and start crying.
The keys fell out of his pocket right then while he rolled around in the blood, sobbing. Then he abruptly ran off.
I stare at the computer screen in shock, Cleetus lied to me.
Hugh: Hold on, this is some new information.
I take the usb and run out of the station. Looks like I should've kept slamming Cleetus for more information. After a short drive over, I make it back to Cleetus's house.
Hugh: OPEN UP.
I hit his door, but this time, there's no answer.
He must've known I'd come back. He's probably hiding inside. I go back to my car and pop the trunk. I grab the shotgun from inside and aim it at the front door.
Hugh: Alright, you asked for this.
I pull the trigger and the door fucking explodes.
Hugh: Oh shit-
Not only do I have pink eye, but now my hearings all messed up.
But I prevail. I kick down the remaining parts of the door and search for Cleetus.
Hugh: Come out come out Cleetus. I just wanna talk to you.
I look around the house for awhile but he's nowhere to be seen. Then suddenly I hear a yell coming from outside.
Cleetus: MY DOOR! WHAT HAPPENED?!?
I run back to the door step to find the man I was looking for.
Hugh: Ah, you've got some explaining to do.
Cleetus: ME?! I LEFT FOR 5 MINUTES AND NOW MY FRONT DOOR IS COMPLETELY DEMOLISHED!
Hugh: That's your fault. If you would've answered I wouldn't have needed to use force.
Cleetus: Are you INSANE?! I WASN'T HOME! I knew you were nuts when I first met you.
Hugh: Yeah.. excuses, excuses. I'm going to have to put you under arrest for lying to an officer.
Cleetus: What?! Is that even an actual crime?! You can't arrest me.
Hugh: Oh yes I can. You told me you went over to the crime scene then ran off. Not once did you mention rolling around in the blood and crying like a baby.
Cleetus gives me a guilty look. He's clearly in shock and scared shitless.
Cleetus: I- how did you-?
Hugh: I got security footage. Seems like you're a lot more suspicious than I thought. Now put your hands behind your back.
Cleetus tries to fight back but I easily cuff him. I then drive him back to the station. This case is about to be solved.
YOU ARE READING
The Crime On Skedaddler Street
Misterio / Suspenso"Not many people can solve the cases I do. In many ways I feel like a unicorn... Like a unicorn among unicorns. A unicorn overlord." Hugh Dunnit, New Yaft's best detective is put on the case when a disastrous crime committed by a criminal is commit...
