Eternal Saṃsāra: The Wanderer of Worlds, Book 1

[118] Just One Pantheon? Nah, I'd Win.

Chapter 118: Just One Pantheon? Nah, I'd Win.

—

We walked by the golden beach side as the sun set in the far. We talked about the scenery for a bit, before falling silent and enjoying it.

Only a few minutes later did we move to more important discussions. Surprisingly, it was Ruby who did it.

"Why are you so... different from when you were Doctor Gorou?" she faced the last shine of the sun and asked.

"Memory loss," I admitted, staring at her side profile. "Right before the end of my 9th life, I had a big fight with a powerful, multiversal organization. They went by the name of the Order of Crimson Abyss. Their goal was to kill me for good so that I don't reincarnate anymore.

"But they didn't quite succeed seeing as how you're here?"

"Kind of," I shrugged. "They did manage to damage my memories exceptionally. I forgot the details of my lives till then and even experienced a series of reincarnations that I have zero memories of even to this day. During my 10th life as Gorou too, I didn't have my earlier memories. Why else do you think I never treated your illness with magic, Ruby?"

"Well..." she stayed silent. I'm sure she had theorized this much herself.

I continued, "My consciousness as well as my memories were amiss during the many reincarnations I've missed. So in those unknown numbers of lives between my 9th and 11th, I didn't have a sense of self. Only out of pure luck, did I even remember my life as Gorou after waking up as Aqua."

"...."

"So essentially, the reason Gorou and I act differently is because he had memory loss and I don't." I finished. "You know, some philosophers may argue that Gorou and I are completely different people, as memories make a man."

"Are you trying to reassure me or giving me more anxiety with that last line?" Ruby asked with a frown and I laughed, pulling her into a hug.

"Why? Did that shake your belief in me?"

"...No" she wrapped her arms around him. "Thanks for telling me. Now I understand things a bit... Does she know?"

She meant Ai. "No, she doesn't. I haven't even told her that I'm Gorou, that will go and needlessly complicate things. Why, aren't you happy being the only one to know these secrets?"

"Yes," she giggled and rubbed her face on my chest. "I love getting special treatment from you."

And honestly, he liked giving her that. His memories and emotions from his 10th life riled up in happiness when he saw Sarina be so happy around him. Even outside that, it was rare he had a sister in his life, let alone a twin. As his other half, he wanted to pamper her.

"You're so clingy," he ruffled her hair.

"I just can't keep myself away from you," she sighed. "Am I annoying?"

"I didn't say that," he kissed her head. "I would rather find you adorable and cute."

"Well, that's because I am." She looked up at my face with a small grin. "Do you remember the promise?"

It could be any promise, she didn't give enough context to give an idea. However, I still had a clear idea of what.

It was about the promise that Sarina made that she'd marry me when she turned 16... She's a few months away from turning 16.

"No idea which one you mean," I said with a confused tilt of my head and she pouted. "Ah, is it the Path that I promised to give you?"

"You're so bad," she grumbled but hugged me tighter. "But I'll assume you haven't yet regained all your memories, that's why you don't know. If you still don't remember in a few months, I'll remind you myself... You better be ready."