Losing Grip

I'm here

Author: Listen Mr.Rain Supereroi while reading it, especially for the end

2023 Austria

LeClerc's POV:

"From the crash he hit his head very hard and he got a very bad concussion. He is in a come, unfortunately we can't tell when he will wake up or if he will ever wake up" -the doctor said

It has shocked me. I have no words. Max is in a coma and I scared like I've never been in my life before. Finally when things started to get better between us and we both started to feel more careless about the public's opinion this happens. He can't leave me now, not when I want to be his team mate at RedBull. But I couldn't think more cause I started to feel dizzy and it became hard to stand. The next thing I remember was that everything went black and I woke up in a bed too. I looked around I saw that I was in the hotel and my mom was sitting next to me on my bed. I looked at her and she grabbed my hand and smiled at me. Then the thought hit me.

"Max! I have to see him!!!" -I shouted with fully wide pupils

"Baby! Everything is okay! Please lay back! You are exhausted, you have to sleep!" -she said worriedly

"I have to see Max!!!" -I screamed and I started to feel the tears in my eyes

I was death scared from loosing him forever. I couldn't bare it. I stood up and put on some shoes. I grabbed my coat and car keys and went to the door.

"It's 1am Charles!" -she shouted back- "Where do you want to go at this time?! You have a race tomorrow!" -she stood up too

"I don't care! I have to see him now!" -I said and shut the door

I went to the car, sat in and I felt the tear running down my cheeks. I love Max. I have to tell him that. Even if he doesn't love me back I have to tell him I love him. He has to wake up and has to hear me. I started the engine and went to the hospital. After a long fighting with the doctors I managed to go in to Max. They didn't want to let me in but Christian was there and he managed to talk with them to go in and see Max. When I went in I saw him lying there like he was dead. I ran to him, sat on the bed, hugged him and started crying. I've cried there for hours. I lied on the small bed next to him, I didn't care about the small place or the race today. I wanted to by his side.

"Je t'aime mon amour..." -I whispered to him and drowned off to sleep

The next morning I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"It's race day. You have to go to the hotel and get ready." -Christian said

I sat up and looked at Max who looked the same as yesterday.

"I don't want to go. I want to be next to him." -I said sadly looking at him

"Charles... Please don't throw your career away in the trash can because Max is in a coma. He will get better I'm sure. I can't imagine how hard it could be for you now and how bad you feel when you loose your loved ones but I really believe Max will get better. He is strong. Much stronger than just pass away from a crash." -he said

"I can't do anything else, just hope" -I said and stood up

"Max won't leave you. But you have to be strong Charles. Be strong for Max. Well, it will sound strange cause you are from the rival team but I hope you will win. You are a good driver Charles. And a good boyfriend too as I see now that you are so caring, and Max is lucky to have you." -he said smiling at me

"I'm not his boyfriend..." -I said looking at the ground

"It's just a title, your feelings are the important. But I have to go now to the paddock. And you should come too." -he said and went to the door

"Yeah, you might be right." -I sighed- "Would you mind to give me a lift to the hotel then to the paddock?" -I asked him

"No problem but you didn't came with a car?" -he asked

"Don't worry about it, I will ask someone to come for it. I don't want to be alone now." -I said a bit shyly

"It's okay. Let's go" -he said and I lead to Max gave a kiss on his temple and left with Christian

We went back to the hotel, I changed my clothes and went to the paddock. We got out of the car and Christian grabbed my arm.

"Do it for Max." -he said and I smiled with bitterness and nodded

After some conversation with my team members the race start's time had come. I sat in the car and tried to only concentrate on the race. I was very stressed, the accident's pictures has flashed back in my mind and even though Max was not racing I started to think about him and how he feels now. I saw Perez trying to overtake me from the right side and it had pulled me out of my thoughts. I didn't let him and tried to pull in front of him. I did it successfully and I was glad about it. I started to feel the adrenaline in my veins and I really wanted to win. More than ever. For Max. Even if he will never be here with me again I want to show him that I'm good and I can win too. I want him to be proud. I crossed the finish line and I won. I was incredibly happy for it. When I went in the pit and got out of the car I ran to my team and they hugged me and they were proud of me. Even Christian came to hug me and to congratulate me. Perez was the second and Alonso was third. We went in the cool down room and they talked about the race but my mind was somewhere else. I was thinking about Max.

"Charles? Are you even listening?" -Alonso asked

"Sorry, I was thinking about something else..." -I said with a sad smile

"You can come to the podium now." -a guy came in and said it

Firstly Alonso went in, then Perez and then I heard my name, but I froze. I felt a bit panic, it was Max's place, it didn't feel right for me to be happy when he is in coma in the hospital and it's not even sure if he will ever wake up. But I started to go out and I stepped on the first step on the podium. I heard my national anthem and the Italian and I started to feel the tears in my eyes. I looked down at my team at the end of the anthems but that's when I saw Max in front of everyone in the empty space in front of my car. Everyone left him space for him to let me see him. He was smiling at me and he was clapping for me. My mind blowed up from happiness, I smiled liked an idiot. As the last chord went silent from the anthems I jumped off the podium and ran down to him. I didn't care about champagne nor the fine I will get for running away before the end but I couldn't wait longer. I ran to Max and he smiled at me and I hugged him like it was the last time. I started sobbing heavily but it was from happiness.

"I can't believe you are here..." -I whispered

"Well, I couldn't miss out seeing you winning right?" -he said and laughed a lightly- "I'm proud of you Charlie" -he said and I let go of my grip a bit to look in his eyes

"I thought I had lost you" -I said and felt the tears running down my cheeks

He looked pale and still looked like he just woke up from a coma so I thought he must feel weak too but Inwas so happy for him. And he is proud of me. I can't believe it.

"I won't leave you Charles. I'm here. And I love you." -he said and smiled

Then he lead forward and kissed me softly. His lips brushed mine and I kissed him back too gently. We were in public but I didn't care about it. The kiss was so soft so nice with so many emotions. It was the best kiss in my life. I put my hands in Max's neck and kissed him a bit deeper and we smiled against each other. This was the time that I understood that I don't fucking care about public. I can't loose Max before we could even try to be together like a normal couple without hiding. Life is short for that. We love each other and I don't want to loose what we have. We just kissed for minutes in front of the whole world like it was the end of the world and nothing but us matters only.

"I love you too." -I broke the kiss and we both smiled softly

We put our forehead together and I put my hands on either side of his face and he grabbed my waist. It was like time has stopped. I didn't hear anything. It was just him and I.