To Love or To Lose

Chapter Seventeen

Soft knocking slowly brought Kong out of his peaceful slumber. He slowly groaned and stretched, noticing the sun was just rising. His phone was still perched against his pillow but his boyfriend was no longer on the line. It must have cut off some time during the night. Despite crying himself to sleep, he smiled when he remembered Arthit singing to him. His boyfriend was such a gem.

Another wave of knocking prompted Kong to sluggishly get out of bed. He rubbed his swollen eyes and went to his bedroom door. He was surprised to see his mother standing there in a simple house dress with one of the house helpers behind her carrying a large tray of tea, biscuits and fruit.

"I thought you would have been awake by now," she said softly. "I wanted us to have tea before you left for school but—"

"It's okay, I can get dressed quickly," Kong told her.

She nodded as he opened the door and let them in. When the helper left, she turned and looked at him.

"My little baby, you look a mess," she sighed, holding his cheek and motioning to his swollen eyes. "Did you cry yourself to sleep?"

Kong only nodded, already feeling tears start to spring.

"Go on and freshen up, I want to talk with you."

Kong showered and washed his face and by the time he was finished and came out of his bathroom, his mother had a steaming plate of eggs and pancakes for him along with the tea. Kong was starving so he didn't mind the western breakfast. He sat around the small coffee table with his mother and they ate in silence. This wasn't anything new. Since he and his mom were early risers, they always had tea and biscuits together while they waited for his father to wake. However, when they had their morning time together it was never quiet. They always chatted and laughed with each other but now there was nothing but silence.

After finishing half her tea, Kaiya finally spoke. "I need to apologize to you son," she said.

Kong froze mid chew and looked at her.

"You told me one of your biggest secrets, one that was probably hard to even tell me and I—I just walked out on you. And that's not the type of mother I promised myself I would be. I left you alone when you needed me most. But understand that I didn't know how to process what you told me. For a moment all I could think about was 'how will I get my grandchildren?', 'What will Kerrkalai think of this?', 'What about our family legacy? Will it just die out?' To be completely honest, I freaked out that all I could do was walk away because I knew it wouldn't be fair to raise these questions to you. It wasn't until three in the morning that my mind finally settled. That it dawned on me that my son is in love. That my son has confided in me his biggest secret. That he's looking for me to support and love him because he doesn't know who else to turn to." She looked at Kong and took his hand.

"I love you, baby boy. And there is nothing in this world that you can do to make me not love you. Well, unless you murder me in cold blood but then I'll just haunt you forever."

Kong chuckled through his sniffles. He wiped his eyes and clenched his mother's hand.

"Now I can see why you were so defensive. Why you didn't want to confide in me or your father about your sex life." She brushed Kong's bangs from his eyes. "I told your dad that I don't want you followed. That I was worried you would keep secrets and start to not trust us because we don't value your privacy. And I told him we raised you so we know you best and we should trust you to be responsible. You always are. I mean look at you now. The top of your batch, and the head hazer, you're growing into a fine young man. Now, luckily for you that you have a boyfriend already."

"Luckily for me?' Kong asked.

"Yes, because then I'll still worry people while try to use your heart to ultimately hurt you which means I'll call you five times a day," she smiled.