Don't believe everything you hear | WLW

Chapter Six | Melancholy

Alethea Montgomery POV

I just couldn't bring myself out of bed. My arm feels so sore. I lift up sleeve while laying down in my bed and it's bad. Super bad. it's bruised on the outskirts of the cuts which has never happened before. They haven't turned white yet.

I texted my aunt telling her I couldn't go to school because of how sick I've been feeling lately. It's not like she would even know, she's hardly here anymore

I spend the whole day moping around. It's starting to get bad again, I don't know why. I haven't felt so low ever since freshman year and I don't know what to think about it. I never want to get out of the lowest times of my life because it's comforting in way.

I have floods of texts coming from Amara as well as some of my friends asking where i've been. I ignore them all. I haven't had as much friends as I would like during my whole highschool experience. Evelyn made it pretty damn clear to everyone that no one could talk to me for some reason. I'm not hers to keep so I don't know why she acts like she owns me.

She just flairs her money around and it's done, what ever she wants. Words can never explain the amount of hell she's raised on my life in such a short amount of time.

I was laying in my bed scrolling on my phone and Amara comes bombarding in my room.

"I knew it, I knew you were ignoring me!" she yells while walking over to my bed.

"I'm sorry Amara, I just didn't want to explain everything, i'm fine." I say straight faced. I really don't want anyone here right now.

"I didn't ask if you were fine, I know something's up with you don't deny it either. Why else would you say you're fine as an automatic response? Talk to me, what is it?" She responds.

She always knows, always. It's hard to keep things from her. She sits down on my bed, next to me.

I'm about to deny it when I take a deep breath and tears fill my eyes. I stutter. Oh no.

"Oh Thea, come here" she says while opening her arms to hug me. I hug her back and lay in her lap.

"I— I'm sorry", is all I can say.

She runs her hands through my hair. "You have nothing to be sorry about Alethea, you don't need to tell me if you don't want to", she says.

A few minutes pass by as I cry in her arms.

"I did it again Amara," I say while stuttering.

"You did what baby?", she asks, concern filling her voice.

I get up and look her in the eye. I realize what I'm going to tell her and I get kind of worried. I guess the look on my face is guilty because she says, "Show me Alethea."

My breathing is erratic, just as I thought I was able to breathe again. The look in her eyes are demanding.

I lift up my sleeve slowly, regret filling my mind. I can't even look at my arm, or her face as I am embarrassed.

I hear her take a deep breath and I look at her. A tear flowing down her cheek like a river.

She takes my arm and starts rubbing it.

"No, no why would you do this to your self? You're so beautiful, why—", she says, her breath hitches.

I panic and start saying, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I won't do it again I promise", I plead with my eyes.

"Don't be sorry baby I'm sorry. Why did you do this to yourself? Will you tell me?" she says while crying.

I start hyperventilating and I can't speak. I try, but no words come out. I hold my hand to my chest and I start panicking even worse than before, I stand up.

"Oh no Thea try to breathe" Amara says.

I get up from off of my bed. "I— I can't breathe, wha— what's happening to me Amara," I say worried.

She stands up and I fall to the ground. She gets down on her knees and asks me, "What can you hear Alethea?" she has such a calm voice. After I got off of my bed, she stopped crying as much as she was before. Probably not to scare me even more.

"Your voice", it comes out in deep breaths, fast.

"Okay good job baby, what can you see?" Amara says.

"I can see—, see your face", I say while looking at her wide eyed.

She takes this as a good sign because she starts rubbing my back in small circles. My breathing calms down after that small gesture. I hug her crying.

"Everything will be okay Thea, it's okay to cry." Amara tells me.

After I've calmed down enough to have a full conversation, I explain to her as best as I could on how I felt when I hurt my self. I tell Amara about my day yesterday and why I wasn't at school if it wasn't obvious. She comforts me and we lay together in my bed eating snacks and watching a movie until I fell asleep in her arms.

This has always been normal in our friendship, holding each other and things like that. I haven't felt so comfortable in a while. I love Amara more than words could ever express.