One Step At A Time - A Dawsey Story

Chapter 8 - "In the next moment, I only heard loud screams"

I need another story
Something to get off my chest
My life gets kinda boring
Need something that I can confess
Til all my sleeves are stained red
From all the truth that I've said
Come by it honestly I swear
Thought you saw me wink, no
I've been on the brink, so

I was just about to take the Coq au Vin out of the oven when the doorbell rang.
"Casey", I shouted, "can you open the door?"
I heard steps coming down the stairs. Then the door that was opened. And in the next moment, I only heard loud screams.
I almost dropped the Coq au Vin and ran out of the kitchen into the hallway.
I had expected to find a murderer in a clowns mask, stabbing Casey with a knife like in a bad horror movie, but what I saw instead was the exact opposite:
Griffin was hanging on Casey's left arm, Ben on his right leg, Heather was standing in the door, laughing tears in her eyes.
Immediately the shock on my face changed into a huge smile.
Casey shook his whole body so the boys were forced to let go of him. He then wrapped his arms around their shoulders, ran his hands through their hair and said: "I've missed you guys."
The scene in front of me got me filled with a warm feeling, seeing Matt like this, scuffing around with the kids, hearing the joy in his voice.

Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away

But along with the warmth also came the sadness that I've been ignoring for so long. Nine months.
Our baby would be born by now.
Once again I pushed these thoughts down and went to welcome Heather.
We hugged and I said: "It's so good to see you." Then we went to  have dinner.
Coq au Vin for us, fries and chicken nuggets for Ben and Griffin.
It was so nice to talk to heather after such a long time, we had so much catching up to do.
We talked about all kinds of random stuff, and once in a while the boys threw stories from school in.
"Oh, by the way", Casey said and took a sip of wine, "you got the invitation card?"
Heather nodded. "Of course! Let me tell you, I absolutely wasn't surprised at all when I heard that you two would be getting married, and neither were the kids!" She took a bit of the chicken. "What date was the wedding again?"
"April 11th", I answered, realizing that it was only about two months away, "you guys are coming, right?"
"There's no way I'm missing this!" Heather grinned. Then she suddenly got serious again. "Oh and Gabby, I honestly have to say, I was in fact surprised when Matt told me you decided to stay on ambo. How come didn't choose to become a firefighter after passing the test?"

My God, amazing how we got this far
It's like we're chasing all those stars
Who's driving shiny big black cars
And everyday I see the news
All the problems that we could solve
And when a situation rises
Just write it into an album
Send it straight to gold
But I don't really like my flow, no, so

Oh crap. The one topic I had been trying to avoid.
I put my fork down and slightly shrugged my shoulders. "It wasn't actually a real 'decision'. It just didn't fit. After the explosion and losing-", I bit my tongue and swallowed hard. I had almost said 'Losing a baby'. "Losing Mills. It was just... too much changing at once, you know."
"Yeah, I understand that", Heather said and luckily dropped the topic.
We continued to eat and at some point Casey, Ben and Griffin started telling jokes and we all laughed. We had a fun time.
After we finished eating, Casey took the boys to the living room to play some video games on his old PlayStation.
Heather and I cleaned the dishes.
"He's really good with kids."
"Huh?" I looked up. Heather was leaning against the fridge, a wet plate in one hand, a towel in the other hand.
She grinned and repeated: "I'm still impressed at how good Matt handles Ben and Griffin. They adore him."
I forced myself to a smile. "Yeah, he's a natural."

Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time, don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away

"Are you planning on having kids?"
I felt like she hit me right in the face, but I did my best to not let it show. "Uhm, we never really talked about it. Maybe, I guess."
„You know", she raised her hands as if she was defending herself, „your kids would be adorable, that's for sure."
Once again it was like a slap in the face. Of course I had been wondering what our baby would look like.
I didn't say anything further and when we finished the dishes, Heather and I went to Matt, Griffin and Ben in the living room and I took out another bottle of wine.
As I wanted to refill Heather's glass, I realized the it was still full. She hadn't touched it all evening.
The time passed by without us even noticing.
It was almost 2 am when Heather said: "Oh wow, we should go home now, it's getting really late."
"Noooooo!", Ben and Griffin screamed in sync, but their mom held on to her decision.

Oh, got no reason, got no shame
Got no family I can blame
Just don't let me disappear
I'ma tell you everything
So tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away

Casey and I accompanied them to the door, and when Matt and Heather hugged, I heard him quietly say: "It was so good to have you here."
Heather agreed by nodding her head. "We'll see each other in two months."
"I'll bring you to your car", Casey offered and left the house with them.
I returned to the living room and sat down on the couch.
As I was sitting there, all by myself, I felt a wave of emotions raising up and overwhelming me.
A tear escaped my eye and I pressed my hand on my mouth to stop myself from sobbing.
"Gabby?"
I lookoed up and saw Casey standing in front of me. "What happened?"
I swallowed down another sob and said with a fragile voice: "Matt, we need to talk."