i'll always find you

CHAPTER 17

I look over at Steve and Natasha as we fly over the Indian Ocean, Brock Rumlow stands next to Steve, and there's a few more SHIELD agents next to him. 

"The target is a mobile satellite launch platform: The Lemurian Star. They were sending up their last payload when pirates took them, 93 minutes ago." Rumlow explains.

"Any demands?" Steve asks.

"A billion and a half." Rumlow resorts.

"Why so steep?" I ask.

"Because it SHIELD's." Rumlow answers in a bitchy tone, he always acts like such a dick.

"So it's not off-course, it's trespassing." Steve states plainly.

"I'm sure they have a good reason." Natasha chines in.

"You know, I'm getting a little tired of being Fury's janitor." Steve replies, I smile.

"Relax, it's not that complicated."

"How many pirates?" I ask.

"Twenty-five, top mercs, led by this guy. Georges Batroc." Rumlow pulls up a photo of a man on the monitor. "Ex-DGSE, Action Division. He's at the top of Interpol's Red Notice. Before the French demobilized him, he had thirty-six kill missions. This guy's got a rep for maximum casualties."

"Hostages?" Steve asks as he studies the screen.

"Uh...mostly techs. One officer, Jasper Sitwell." Rumlow pulls up a photo of Sitwell, "they're in the gallery."

"What's Sitwell doing on a launch ship?" I ask.

"Alright, I'm gonna sweep the deck and find Batroc. Nat, Lizzie, you'll kill the engines and wait for instructions. Rumlow, you sweep aft, find the hostages, get them to the life-pods, get 'em out. Let's move." Steve instructs. 

"STRIKE, you heard the Cap. Gear up."

~

"Secure channel seven." Steve says into his wrist communictor. 

"Seven secure. Did you do anything fun Saturday night?" Natasha asks him with a smirk, there's been some tension between them lately. 

"Well, all the guys from my barbershop quartet are dead, so... No, not really."

"Coming up by the drop zone, Cap." The pilot's voice says.

"You know, if you ask Kristen out, from Statistics, she'd probably say yes." Natasha laughs.

"That's why I don't ask." Steve replies.

"Too shy or too scared?"

"Too busy!" He jumps out of the jet.

"Was he wearing a parachute?"

"No. No, he wasn't." I hear the agents laughing in disbelief. 

I turn towards Natasha, as we prepare our parachutes. "why don't you ask Steve out?" 

I see her smile, causing me to mirror her expression. 

"Come on, you two are always looking so lovely dovey at each other."

Natasha smirks, "No we aren't and I don't know if Rogers could even handle me."

I laugh causing Rumlow and the rest of the agents to look at me, I bite my lip while Natasha laughs softly.

~

After the mission ends, I head back with Natasha.

Steve and I have dinner in my apartment after he gets back from SHIELD headquarters.

"What's wrong? You've been on edge since the mission..." I ask softly as he picks at his food.

"Nothing. I just....something feels off to me."

"With SHIELD?"

"I don't know...it's just the whole mission felt strange..then Fury is building these helicarriers, he wants to use them to elimate enemies before they can even attack."

"Wait...Fury wants to elimate people before they even do something wrong?"

"Yeah...he said it's elimating a threat. But it's wrong, the punishment should come after the crime."

"I still struggle to keep up with all of this technology, things should be simpler, but everything just feels so complex."

"I know...it's wrong. I thought SHIELD was helping people. What if the techology is wrong, what if innocent people get hurt? How do we even know the tech is accurate?"

"I know..." I sigh, "but we have to trust Fury."

"It's wrong, we shouldn't be a part of this."

"Are you saying you want to quit SHIELD?" 

He pauses, "no...I just...this feels wrong..."

We sit in silence for a few moments before I speak up.

"I just want to do the right thing...if you think SHIELD is wrong..."

Steve gives me a small smile, "let's give them one more chance." 

I nod.

"Hey um...have you heard about the exhibition in the Smithsonian?" 

I nod, "Nat told me."

"Do you want to go?" He asks shyly.

~

I hop on the back of Steve's motorcycle wrapping my arms around his waist, we drive towards the museum. 

After we walk in I look around at the display and smile softly feeling for just a second that we are back in the 40s where we belong.

I notice Steve looking around in awe at all the photos of him. "Someone is famous." I tease.

"No..no I'm no one special."

I laugh softly, "you sure? Look around." 

He smiles softly as he looks at the exhibt decidated to him.

Battle tested, Captain America and his Howling Commandos quickly earned their stripes. Their mission, taking down HYDRA, the Nazi rogue science division. A voice recording says over the exhibt. 

Our eyes land on the Howling Commandos display. There's an image of Steve, Bucky, me, and the rest of the men. My eyes immediately land on Bucky's picture. Then down to the display of his outfit which I know isn't the real one, not after he....

"Lizzie? You okay?" Steve asks softly snapping me out of my daze, as I suddenly feel tears on my cheeks. 

I nod softly and walk towards another display, this one making my heart sink further. 

A FALLEN COMRADE

My eyes scan over the explanation as tears fall faster down my cheeks, there's a photo of Bucky next to the paragraphs explaining his life and his demise. My eyes wander down to a small video player, the video shows Bucky laughing alongside Steve and I.

His smile. His face. The way he looked at me. His smile.....

I feel a hand on my shoulder, trying to comfort me. Steve.

Barnes is the only Howling Commando to give his life in service of his country. The narration continues over the speakers.

My hands find the dog tag around my neck. I start sobbing. I feel Steve's arms pull me into a hug, he rubs my back softly. 

I look back down at the video, Steve's eyes follow mine. Bucky's smile while his hand wraps around my waist. 

Steve pulls me tighter into the hug as I sob my heart out.