Broken & Ruined | TAEKOOK

twenty-eight

Students are slowly disappearing along the hallway to the 3rd floor. They seemed to be in their classrooms by then. When Taehyung reached the room, the teacher was there waiting. Mr. Oh immediately flashed a smile as soon as he saw the student. While Taehyung only bowed to greet in respect.

"How's your studies?" Mr. Oh asked him and gestured to one of the seats in the first row while he leaned to his desk. Taehyung obeyed and sat, noticing the smile on the teacher's lips.

"I wouldn't beat around the bush, Taehyung. I know you have an idea why I called you in here," he started. "I just want to say sorry for inflicting you─ and the others─ in this. Soyeon was a sweet and kind girl, you know. But I didn't know she had some serious problems in and out of the campus," he sighed. "I have no idea what's going on in the girl's mind. But I hope she'll be okay after she transfers."

"Did you call me just to hear you apologize?" Taehyung asked. "You are aware I have classes too, right."

Mr. Oh chuckled. He's aware that Taehyung's an assertive, straight to the point person that some other people might misunderstand him as rude. But he couldn't help but feel a bit offended. However, he finds the behavior intriguing. "Yeah, I'm sorry I bothered you. It slipped into my mind that you're studious and a learning enthusiast." He said, "I just thought it's the only time I can talk to you since you usually head to the study room afterward, and I didn't want to bother you either." He paused.

"I have been a problem to everybody here, and if I told you I wish I could just disappear with no trace and everybody could just forget about me, I meant it," he laughed. "Some students became very skeptical and distant. For certain reason, I make them uncomfortable." His face softened. He asked him, "Do I somehow make you uncomfortable? Taehyung?" His eyes darted to him, expecting an answer. If there is someone who can provide genuine observation and feedback, he thought that Taehyung is the perfect person for his nature, honesty, and keenness.

Taehyung did not budge and only stared back, thinking. There were times he's uncomfortable with people touching him. And he dislikes the idea of people getting too close or touchy, especially without his prior permission. He recalled the time he and Mr. Oh had an interaction in the study hall. He shuddered simply by the act of receiving a pat on his shoulders.

Since he often receives recognition, he has no problem with receiving compliments and congratulations. But it's different when it's done in private than on the stage. Especially when it were just the two of them. He never felt comfortable at the presence of a stranger.

But instead of saying what he had in mind, he answered, "I don't think I am the right person for you to ask, Mr. Oh."

"Why not?"

"Because I am a boy."

There was a short pause between their conversation. Right. He's a boy. It is completely a different situation for different genders. It must have an impact more on the girls than the boys. Even though it is possible for the other gender to be a victim too, Taehyung wanted to add.

Mr. Oh nodded slowly, understanding. "But well, should I ask a girl then?" he jokingly asked. "It would be more wrong if I do that, wouldn't it? That's why it's really hard for me to know who I am going to ask and talk to."

"If you are looking for a friend, sir, you might've chosen the wrong person," Taehyung responded.

"I'm not looking for a friend, Kim," the teacher defended, still with a slight smile, or maybe a smirk, on his lips. "I just needed some advice from you. I don't know, it's just that, I don't think anybody else can be of help."

"But I am just a student here, sir."

"Exactly. How am I supposed to seek feedback about how students feel about me if I am not to ask one? I don't think my students trust me the way they were before. I don't know if it's just me thinking that way or it is how it is." Taehyung saw a glimmer in the teacher's eyes, but he failed to identify what it is. Is it worry? Or despair? He doesn't know. But still, no matter how hard he tries to think, he couldn't find a way to help him. Nor a reason to help him.