Our Happy Days (Together)

Summer War

I am not attractive... it's not like I believed for a moment that I was handsome in anyway or form but I thought that my feelings made up for that, that if I was honest a girl would be able to see past my appearance and consider me but I was wrong.

For them I'm not a boy I am like a prop that is just there to be ignored. Realizing that hurts, a lot. After that day I didn't talk to Tom because he went on a trip to London to visit his grandmother, so the only one who could cheer me up wasn't around.

I decided to change after watching a movie; the main character was fat but then becomes thin and takes vengeance upon those who rejected him. The image of a slender me returning after summer break to school appeared on my mind, In this delusion Katie's jaw dropped to the floor and everyone couldn't stop looking at me. I wonder If I became like that could I break her heart?

No. I don’t want to do that.

My first day of summer break was spent browsing the web for resources, the easiest one was my face, I found tons and tons of garbage about creams and lotions and prayers. In the end I decided to go the scientific way and use Hydrogen Peroxide with rice soap daily. Now that I think about it I only cleaned my face when I took a shower.

Second my weight I like to eat a lot it's one of the greatest pleasures of life but I need to lose weight, I found a board where people were kind of obsessed with their fitness it had a good thread with resources on how to lose weight. It was actually pretty simple. It boils down to burn more calories than you consume. There are not miracle diets of any kind just plain hard work and persistence, as exercise I chose running, I found a nice guide on how to start even you had never exercised before.

The first day of summer break ended I had all my research saved on my hard-drive when I went to sleep, I couldn't close my eyes because every time I saw that expression of her 'Don't ever talk to me again' damn her! How can love become hate so easily?

The second day I had a banana for breakfast my dear mother's almost cried when I refused the delicious breakfast she had made for me. Two scrambled eggs a hot potato with sour cream, a toast with butter... just thinking about it made me want to eat it but I just need to close my eyes and take a look at that expression to lose all my appetite.

I put on my tennis, sweatpants and a hoodie.

"Where are you going like that?"

"Running"

"What! Mom! Sandy is sick" What? Even my little sister took on that stupid nick name I should never have introduced Tom to her.

"I'm not sick you little monster I just want to..." ups I almost spill the beans there

"What is this, do you feel sick—" Mom asked me this with the concern only a mother can muster

"Mom! Mom! Sandy says he is going to run! is he sick or something?"

"... don't worry dear your brother is in that age, take care and return before it's dark"

hell at least they didn't make a big fuzz about all this, I'm free to do whatever I want before it's dark.

I reached the nearby park it had a nice running lane. The park was surrounded by houses and a hill where an expensive looking house was. I looked at it and someone was on the terrace, it was a girl under an umbrella I couldn't see her very well because it was so far away.

I started jog lightly for about 15 minutes and I was already panting like a dog in summer, but every time I closed my eyes there was that expression and my feet continued moving, they hurt so much... it's just been only fifteen minutes and I'm talking like I've doing this all day so I continued and every time I was about to stop I closed my eyes and I kept jogging I know my research said that I should take this slow at first but I just couldn't, one hour passed and I knew I should have stopped but I didn't then the second hour and the muscles of my legs felt like they were made of needles, I wanted the pain to stop but each time I remembered the strongest pain that I didn't want to feel again so I continued moving forward. Without care of my own body that screamed at me to stop.