Onyx

Chapter 10: In Which She Shares a Memory (Onyx)

Tick. Tock. Tick.

My teeth pierced my lip harder than I intended as I stared at the ticking clock. It was driving me mad. Five minutes had passed since she had asked me about the evolution of our friendship.

Undoubtedly, some of my greatest memories were spent with Ruby.

However, we also shared many dark times together. And quite frankly I hesitated to discuss them with anyone. But maybe that was the reason I still struggled with my mental health to this day. Anytime an issue arises I tend to suppress the memory and forget about it. It had always been easier that way, but not very beneficial in the long run.

It was different with Ruby. She's seen sides of me that I didn't even dare to let Khalan witness. But that's because we were friends.

Right?

Embarrassing. Times that I don't want to revisit.

It was obvious that I needed clarity from an outside source. I can't be trusted to resolve this same ongoing issue with me and my supposed best friend. I still don't even understand why we're always fighting over Khalan. Maybe I'll gain some type of insight from letting this lady inside of my head.

The sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted my train of thought.

Petrova's wired-rimmed glasses were perched low on her nose as she continued to examine my facial expressions that I was failing to control. She was quiet, waiting for me to expose myself to her. There was a slight glint in her eyes that I didn't even want to begin to decipher.

The first memory that popped into my head made my stomach churn. Now that I look back on it, she was always so possessive over me. Maybe I was too dense to understand what was going on inside of her head.

I bit back all my angst, determined to finally put the pieces of our friendship together. Except, the edges were now jagged and uneven. None of these pieces fit or were tangible anymore. Seemingly impossible to reconstruct them in their original form.

Sigh. Why did I have to send her that stupid email? Why did I almost fuck Ruby?

I hated this memory. Suddenly, my lips began to tell a story of their own accord despite my subconscious' dismay.

"Onyx? You can't possibly still be mad at me."

Silence. I just stared up at her from my fetal position on the black plush rug that sat on the pale hardwood flooring.

She stood in the open doorway, one of her hands resting on the door frame that was above her head. She almost looked like she felt guilty. But I knew better than to believe that.

She couldn't feel guilt.

Ruby's waist-length wavy hair was swept over her left shoulder. Its thick, curly strands fell past her waist. The curls that hung closer to her crown were tighter in texture and framed her face artfully. The usually hidden blond highlights shined in the glaring August sun as it bounced off the cream-colored walls in my bedroom. My eyes flickered down to her faded green t-shirt that she'd hacked into a crop top and the khaki shorts that always fit her so perfectly. She looked almost ethereal.

What was I even thinking?

The weather has been so hot lately that I wouldn't doubt if I was delirious. But the grueling temperatures lacked in comparison to the heat that burned inside of me. The contempt I felt for Ruby in this moment was unreal. How could she possibly ruin things for me and Khalan? I knew that he wasn't perfect, but that didn't mean that she needed to assert herself in my relationship. What gave her the right?