Jariana: Best mistake

Justin 12: My source

I went back to L.A. smoothly.

It was already night time when I got to my apartment.

From: momma biebs

Heard youre home :) hoping for you to come and visit us here

I smiled at her thoughtful message. I actually missed home. No mom cooking, no Jaxon and Jazmyn, and no instruments.

When I was starting up in this career, I never wanted to leave home. But I guess it became normal to me; Going to concerts, guesting and doing music.

I love music - hey, but family is different. I can write anytime, but I can't always be with my family and that's sad.

Then a sudden feeling of writing got to me. I snapped my fingers and quickly went to my drawer in my room. "Where is that thing...?" I murmured to myself as I check every corner of my drawer filled with papers, a calculator, and more school stuff. When I saw that one lucky pen I call, I quickly got it in my hand and raised it high, acting like the one in Lion King.

I got a paper and sat down on my desk. I turned on the lamp shade and focused on words that are swimming in my mind.

"What should be my inspiration?" I asked myself. "What affects me the most right now?"

Then... A familiar face flashed in my mind. "Oh.."

I quickly wrote down: i gave you the key to the door that wasn't open

I looked at it and read it in my mind. "It's quite long." I crossed out some words and came up with: i gave you the key when the door wasn't open. "Alright."

Then more words.

just admit it,
See I gave you faith turned your doubt in to hoping,
can't deny it
Now I'm all alone and my joys turned to moping

I can feel my emotions rising up in my heart. And it was both good and bad for me.

Good, because I can form words into sentences and phrases with a lot of feelings. But bad, because my heart is aching with the emotions. I can feel it, throbbing in my heart. My heart pounded louder as I continue to write:

Tell me here,
where are you now that I need you?
Where are you now?
Where are you now that I need ya?

"Where are you now." I muttered to myself as memories flash into my mind.

Couldn't find you anywhere..
When you broke down I didn't leave ya
I was by your side
So where are you now that I need ya?
Where are you now that I need ya?

"When you cried, I held you in my arms. And, where are you now that I need you?" I murmured to myself, shook my head, closed my eyes and more words flashed in my head. I opened my eyes quickly. "Where is she? Did I give her away or was it really the right thing to do?" I got a small pillow and pressed my head on it. I was thinking too much. But I can't stop. My hands got a mind of its own and I continued to write down:

I gave you attention when nobody else was payin'
I gave you the shirt off my back what you sayin'

"What you saying...?" I tapped on my pen on the desk and thought of more words.

I showed you the game everybody else was playin', that's for sure
And I was on my knees when nobody else was prayin', oh Lord