I'll take my time | Noah sebastian

Chapter 20

//Warnings: smut towards the end.\\

Everlee

Obviously along the morning I put two and two together that Noah and I are sharing a room.

We've shared a room and a bed more times than I can possibly count, the hotel being one of them. It's nothing new, yet I can tell there is something new.

This isn't like every other time we've shared a room, this is more permanent. There's a conversation waiting to happen in that bedroom that I don't know if I'm entirely ready for.

It will either make or break me.

After getting food for everyone we all mustered up some energy to run to the store and get sheets, blankets and groceries but sleep deprivation kicked in when we got back.

I'm standing in front of the mirror of the big bathroom staring at my reflection. I've washed my face twice, put my hair up and then took it down, finding random things around the bathroom to do. I know I'm just slowing down the inevitable.

He offered to sleep on the couch but I wasn't going to let him do that. He deserves to sleep in a bed after everything we've been through.

Once we got home and everyone said their goodnights for the day, our sleep schedule will be very messed up for a few days, Noah and I slowly walked into the bedroom together. It's been well over 20 minutes since then.

There's a deep, swirling feeling in my chest that I can't quite explain. It's closer to fear and anxiousness but I know what those feel like more than anyone, I have nothing to fear. It's just Noah.

I take a deep breath and give myself one more look over, suddenly my all pink nightgown feels too childish for the situation I've put myself in but, it's my most comfortable one.

I turn towards the bathroom door and slowly creep out. At the first glance I think he's asleep, he's stretched out across the bed with one hand behind his head and his eyes set low. The lights are shut off and the curtains drawn, making the room almost pitch black.

At the sound of my feet against the wood floors he turns his head and calls out for me, "Hey. I thought you fell asleep in there."

His voice is low and calm, much different to how mine is when I awkwardly laugh and look down towards the floor, "yeah sorry, I was just washing my face."

He hums and pats the spot next to him, signaling for me to crawl in the bed. I take a shaky breath and start towards him.

Why am I so nervous? Nothing is even happening yet my brain feels like it's running 90 miles an hour. This is Noah. This is the guy you grew up with, the man you've lived with for two years. But this is also the Noah that has played with my feelings more times than I can count.

Why does everything feel different?

Once I press my knee to the bed and lift myself up, he reaches his hands out towards me and I take them hesitantly. He leads me up to the pillows and I slide under the blankets, lying on my back beside him.

He doesn't say anything for a long time. He traces his fingers across mine and rubs comforting circles onto the back of my hand, my eyes start to flutter close no matter how much I try to pry them open.

Finally, he speaks.

"I've been trying to think of the best way to apologize. There's so much I have to apologize for, Ev. I'm sorry for all those times I messed with your feelings, I was trying to hide my own and I guess I was being selfish. I'm sorry for everything that happened the night I came home to Folio being in the house. If that's what you wanted then I should have kept my mouth shut. I'm sorry for Ana, I'm sorry for every other girl I let push us apart. I'm sorry about your parents, and I'm sorry about the night of the party."