The Amari War

Chapter 7

The next day, I went back to my old house. I wanted to talk to my mom. Maybe she could help me figure things out.

Apparently, she wasn't busy with training. She had beaten me back to the house from the daily meeting and was now roasting a fish for breakfast. I sat down on the floor next to her. I was tempted to set the fish on fire, but reminded myself that I'm no longer a child. I have to be mature and stuff.

"How is the army going?" Reilyn asked, turning the fish over. I hesitated a moment, glancing around the room. My former house was already nostalgic. My life had changed so much since then.

"It's okay. What do you think of all this..." I paused, casting around for a word, "nonsense?"

"Well, we'll just have to wait and see how it turns out. Still, it's weird... people aren't as eager to fight as they used to be. In the last battle, I..." She broke off, shaking her head. "Nothing. Everything's fine."

"Reilyn, you're my mother. You've always told me everything I asked you to tell me, and I've done the same. Why start keeping secrets now? You know I won't judge you," I told her.

She sighed. "Well, all right. In the last battle, I was killing this guy- I disemboweled him and left him to bleed out. At least, I tried. But I didn't get far before I decided to slice his head off. I guess I just remembered that he's a human, and he doesn't deserve to die that painfully."

I drew my knife and stabbed the floor, twisting my knife and tearing up the wood. "Huh. I wouldn't have expected that. You've always been pretty sadistic. Where did you get morals?"

"Morals? I've always had morals. I don't hurt Coven members. Not outside of training, anyway."

"Yeah, but how could you forget that our opponents are human too? Do you usually just torture and kill them without a second thought?"

"No," she said defensively. "I always killed them in whatever way came to mind first. That time, I just happened to think of disembowelment. But then I regretted it. I don't understand it, Trey! I've never regretted anything I did to our enemies! They're our fucking enemies! I don't know what the hell came over me!"

I drove my knife deeper into the wooden floor, tearing out a chunk of wood and tossing it into the fire. "That's just human decency, Reilyn. My year group agrees that they're human- Sophie and I even talked about trying to end the war. Not that it could ever work. Just hypothetical nonsense, all of it."

Reilyn froze, staring at me. "End... the war? End it? But why? War is our entire lifestyle! What would we do without enemies to kill?"

"Oh, there'll always be enemies to kill. But there's nothing to worry about, Reilyn. We'll never be able to end the war, not with people like you running the army. I just don't understand it- why do you think so differently from us? Does your year group feel the same way?"

"I've talked to them. They agree that things are going to shit. Ribe was warned that we were planning an attack, even though we weren't even planning an attack! It was spontaneous, and they still somehow had a warning! Who warned them, I wonder..." She trailed off, flipping the fish absentmindedly. She didn't notice that it was already blackened and burnt.

"Well, things are going to shit, I won't deny that... But I asked you a different question. Does your year group also think that the war shouldn't end? Even though more people are dying every day?"

"Yeah. I think you guys are just too soft. Feeling guilt and all that- humanizing the enemy- that'll get you killed someday. Imagine feeling sympathy for people who want you dead! Idiocy, that's what it is."