The war inside me

Chapter 8

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Invisible hands were touching my body,cold shivers making me wonder if I finally went insane. "Harder, child! Fight harder!", a deep voice woke me up from my pain. Just in time.

I dodged the knives aimed at me against the arena wall and ran to the opposite wall. Tired.  I was so tired. "If you don't win this fight, I will break your legs and arms!", the same voice echoed  trough the din-darkness. I clenched my teeth, trying to find any way to kick my opponent out of his feet,but shit, I am 10 and he is probably around 30.

Footsteps alerted me that someone was approaching and I tensed every fibre and muscle in my body, waiting. And I waited. But nothing happened. It was an endless cycle of death and suspens.

I exhaled in relief, thinking that finally the danger is gone. But I should have known better. Strong hands grabed my waist,smaking my head against the stone wall, my vision becoming blurry at the edges"Never, never let your guard down! ", the same voice I heard before whispred in my ear.

I swallowed hard my body being lifted without gentleness and taken to my room. He broke my hands. 3 months later my legs. I never lost a fight after that. And the man I fought against 8 years ago? I searched for him and did the same as my master did to me. I broke every bone in his helpless body, then I set him on fire.

Anger was
   Better than tears
   Better than grief
   Better than guilt

"Maybe you should stop drinking.", the muscular elf in front of me said. He leaned on and tried to grab the glass I was holding, but I didn't let it go.

"I only had 4 glasses.",I said

He tried again"4 glasses of wine, 3 of champagne and another 5 of whiskey. If you won't die by falling from a cliff, you'll die thanks to your liver."

" Fine, mom. ", I giggled

For a few moments he froze, his hand half at the distance from my glass. Wow. He had big hands."Give it to me."

I gave him my glass after I drank all the liquid inside, the wine burning my throat and my stomach.Well, I just signed up for some sick games from where I probably won't escape. Shit.

Aiden explained to me what they actually consist of:deadly challenges and monsters, no help  from the outside, but all the players are going to be monitorized.Oh,I nearly forgot. Wild animals will hunt us, along with dragons and some of Zesstra's sick experiments.And I am so sorry if I wanna die from alcohool.

"Let's take you home.", Aiden said, gently picking me up. His arms felt like comfort, his heat reminding me of a home I never had.

13 more hours. 13 more hours until the game begins and I will die. 13 more hours to live. And I wanna sleep. If I have to do something before I die, I will certanly choose to eat and sleep. I want to die from diabetes and fat on my organs, because that's how you know you lived a good life. Eat, sleep. My impossible dream.

When I was announced how soon the games will start, I nearly chocked the elf in front of me, but he said that he didn't found another moment to tell me. Fine. Fine, no problem. I will chock him later, after I kill that fucking demonic queen and win her amazing games, and then I will get Aiden and a bunch of steroid-addicted elves and rush to the land of mortals, so I can get my throne back. Easy.

If you asked me how I got to my room, or how I ended up in my fancy silk gown, or how I woke up in a bedroom I only owned for 2 days, I certanly wouldn't be able to tell you. I only woke up once in the process when my dizzy mind heard 2 voices, one of them belonging to the boy I took dinner with, the other was a female. Deborah."You did it?", the female asked.

"Yes, she agreed, but I had to promise to support her war."

Pause. "Are you... Crazy? Insane? Did she drugged you?", the a swear came.

"Don't. Just don't. Be happy that she will fight at our side."

Pause. "I am trying, Aiden, I really am. But I want revenge on her. She killed my family and left me in pieces. I wish I was the one to kill her.", a surprised moan escaped my lips, and the door closed, the rest of the conversation went private. I sighed. I know how it is to be left broken and everyone you ever cared to die. I really do. I imagine a little Deborah-or maybe she wasn't little at all-crying over some corpses. Her tears disturbing the lake water. That's what happened to me. That's how I grieved.

The dreams I use to have are full with death and ghosts, glimers of past and future are brought to me when I am sleeping. It's weird,to see that. To see what will happen, not necessarily to me, but to other people.I keep thinking if I am a witch, so maybe everyone else was right about me:I have something demonic inside.

But this dream... This dream was something sweet, an escape door. I saw my mother and my father together,my little figure between them. I was a baby, my eyes glimmering with the same weird power that brought me the name of "demon". I was happy in this dream. My parents were too.My father wasn't grumpy anymore,his face was embroided with the most beautiful smile I've ever seen, and he kissed my mother's hand and she laughed.

Somehow,my heart broke.They could never be so happy with me, never. My father used to seem like a perfect ruler,a perfect man, but only I knew how wrong this was.

I woke up with cold sweat all over my body, tears weeting my hair and pillow. And my head... Gods, my head. I never felt so dizzy, and it was impossible hard to keep it up. Uhh. And that... Sun. Shit. I am dying.

A knock on the door made my head hurt even more and I mumbled something really obscene to that door. I hate mornings too.

Aparently,the door didn't felt ofended by my words, and it opened. I raised my head from under the pillow I held over my face, and I saw Aiden. I guess he doesen't have anymore servants to rely on. "Go away!", I yelled.

He giggled and aproached my bed. "I told you to be careful with the alcohool.", He said gently.

I threw a pillow at his head, but he easily dodged. "Well shit, genius!Today I have to enter a fucking contest which probably will kill me. I need more alcohool.",my head was screaming for help and I didn't need any reminder of what will happen today. Maybe I was drugged, maybe it was the romantic air of the grove, but I have no idea why I accepted. Stupid.

" Get up. You need to get ready. "

I managed to push my body off the bed and crawl to the shower. "Are you gonna stay there while I'm washing myself?", I asked

Aiden rolled his eyes and walked to the door. "Careful, angel. Careful." I showed him my middle finger and he laughed.

Annoying bitch. Anyway. I took a shower, and watched myself in the huge silver mirror. Wrapped in a towel to big for my petit body, with my wet hair and skin still red from the boillig water, I looked less like the girl I knew. I looked scared. That's all. Sure, I felt this feeling a lot, but somehow I always managed to hide it. Now, it came out. But despite this, I looked good. My hair was a pure shade of black, waves falling on my shoulders and below my waist. I had a small nose and high cheeckbones, my tan skin was in contrast with my violet eyes. They are big and full of life, long dark lashes making them gorgeous. I smiled.

I dried myself and went back to the bedroom,only to find a dark fighting suit on the bed. Leather and many pockets for knives and different weapons. It was amazing, the kind that only the richest assassins had the privilege to wear.

Maybe there's a chance in winning. Maybe. And maybe I will find peace after everything ends.